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He was really into family... He'd never come on the road with me on the weekends 'cause he wanted to spend time with his wife.
Amy Schumer
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Amy Schumer
Age: 43
Born: 1981
Born: June 1
Actor
Comedian
Not Funny
Podcaster
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Director
Television Producer
Writer
Manhattan borough
New York City
Amy Beth Schumer
Wanted
Weekends
Come
Weekend
Really
Road
Never
Spend
Time
Cause
Wife
Causes
Family
More quotes by Amy Schumer
I'm not sure I'd classify any topics as off-limits, but I don't look for new territories to offend. There's my joke about when my roommate beat cancer. People talk about cancer survivors like they're warriors, but from where I was sitting, she was just watching television and eating soup. Like, did she go to war? No. She kind of just sat around.
Amy Schumer
I'm still proud of a lot of my jokes when I started.
Amy Schumer
I was actually on two reality shows, which is crazy. Just to think that, out there, there was some guy, like flipping through the channels, being like, 'Hey, I 69'd her on a cruise ship.
Amy Schumer
I've got a terrible person in me just as much as anybody else, and I think - I like to think I also have a really good person in me.
Amy Schumer
I'll never forget how she told us. She took us all out to brunch, and she was like, 'You guys, I'm keeping this one.'
Amy Schumer
I hope that the next time you go to a concert, the band doesn't play the song you wanna hear! And instead, they just play songs off their new album!
Amy Schumer
I don't try to be feminist. I just am. It's innately inside me. I have no interest in trying to be the perfect feminist, but I do believe feminists are in good hands with me.
Amy Schumer
You know what they say: 'Once you go black, your parents don't talk to you anymore.
Amy Schumer
You shoot saltwater in your ass?
Amy Schumer
I call myself a comic.But I started as an actress. I did plays since I was 5.
Amy Schumer
I care about what the people I care about think about me. It's a short list, but I really care about what those people think.
Amy Schumer
I tend to eat pretty healthy, though, and I work out - I work out hard.
Amy Schumer
I've always been really dark, and drawn to darker humor. Nothing has been forced, and I don't say anything for shock value.
Amy Schumer
Every woman deals with sexism most every day of their lives. Growing up, it's just in your day-to-day. There are all these preconceived notions of what it means to be a woman or a girl, and straying from those ideas of femininity is sort of shocking to people. I felt angered by that as a kid. I felt like that was unjust. Like that was not right.
Amy Schumer
To me, feminism means equality between men and women. I want to make people laugh and also point out some injustices or inequalities I see.
Amy Schumer
I want to make women laugh. I want to make them feel beautiful in their own skin. I want to empower them to use their voice and not apologize.
Amy Schumer
Stand-up is not something that you're good at right away. You have to do it a ton. But, I think I got to shave a year off because I didn't have to get over stage fright.
Amy Schumer
I feel very comfortable in my own skin. When someone makes jokes about me being heavy, it makes me mad. It's not true. I'm right where I should be.
Amy Schumer
I always did plays, I got the comedic roles in college ... or, uh, the ones that would get naked.
Amy Schumer
I feel very open with people, and I'm good at disarming them and having conversations.
Amy Schumer
