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Comedy isn't really something where you get discovered. You can't network your way to being funny or talented. It's not hard to get seen if you're funny. If you're funny, talented, and work hard, you will go somewhere.
Amy Schumer
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Amy Schumer
Age: 43
Born: 1981
Born: June 1
Actor
Comedian
Not Funny
Podcaster
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Director
Television Producer
Writer
Manhattan borough
New York City
Amy Beth Schumer
Way
Somewhere
Comedy
Seen
Funny
Hard
Work
Network
Something
Talented
Really
Discovered
More quotes by Amy Schumer
It was the best night of my life, getting to dance on stage with Madonna!
Amy Schumer
I'm still proud of a lot of my jokes when I started.
Amy Schumer
Now every idiot from high school's like, 'I'm back!' We weren't supposed to meet again. Stop poking me and inviting me to your weird vampire parties. No, I don't want to follow you on Twatter. Like, nobody's interested in you. I don't want to see you in real life, why would I want to follow you in the imaginary one?
Amy Schumer
He was really into family... He'd never come on the road with me on the weekends 'cause he wanted to spend time with his wife.
Amy Schumer
The girls I grew up with they're living normal, adult lives. So they call me now and they're like, 'Amy, I'm pregnant.' And I still react like, 'What are you going to do? I'll drive you, I guess.
Amy Schumer
I only wear heels when it's 100-percent required, and even sometimes not then. I have to talk myself into a bra. I've done an hour of standup where I've been like, I don't have to wear a bra tonight. If you're going to be on camera, you have to get it together, but other than that, I am pretty lazy as a woman.
Amy Schumer
I feel very comfortable in my own skin. When someone makes jokes about me being heavy, it makes me mad. It's not true. I'm right where I should be.
Amy Schumer
You know what the worst part about my drinking is? When I'm drunk I slur. You know, like I say racial slurs. Wow, nobody likes that at a barbeque.
Amy Schumer
I am a hot-blooded fire and I am fearless.
Amy Schumer
I only met Joan Rivers once. But when she passed away, it felt like a part of me went away, too.
Amy Schumer
Want me to Stevie Wonder my way to the bathroom?
Amy Schumer
I've always been really dark, and drawn to darker humor. Nothing has been forced, and I don't say anything for shock value.
Amy Schumer
I think you can go from being not very funny to working really hard for 10 years and figuring out how to make a living on the road, but I don't think you can rise much above that.
Amy Schumer
I don't try to be feminist. I just am. It's innately inside me. I have no interest in trying to be the perfect feminist, but I do believe feminists are in good hands with me.
Amy Schumer
I asked for a glass of Chardonnay. And in a 9/11-like twist, they didn't have any. They offered me Pinot.
Amy Schumer
The last couple of roles I missed out on went to Jennifer Hudson, Jessica Biel and Olivia Wilde.
Amy Schumer
I completely identify as female, believe it or not.
Amy Schumer
She's always bragging about the dumbest stuff. The other day she was telling me, she's like, 'You know I can still fit in my wedding dress.' I was like, 'Oh my god, who cares, right?' I mean it is weird that she's the same size now as she was when she was 8 months pregnant.
Amy Schumer
The way that these girls keep themselves skinny is awful, isn't it? By vomiting or using hard drugs - which I can't afford.
Amy Schumer
My mom made me think I was gorgeous. When I was younger she was like, 'Look at you! You're an angel. You sparkle!' And I was like, 'I do!' You believe your parents.
Amy Schumer