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Tiger parenting is all about raising independent, creative, courageous kids. In America today, there's a dangerous tendency to romanticize creativity in a way that may undermine it.

Amy Chua

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Amy Chua
Age: 61
Born: 1962
Born: October 26
Economist
Lawyer
Professor
University Teacher
Writer
Champaign
Illinois
Amy L. Chua
Creativity
Tiger
Dangerous
Tigers
Creative
Parenting
Kids
Raising
America
Courageous
Today
Tendency
May
Tendencies
Romanticize
Way
Independent
Undermine

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A Western upbringing tends to stress questioning authority, which is always asking why, why, why.
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When my kids wanted to give up on things, I wouldn't let them, and those are lifelong lessons.
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You know, parenting is so personal. And we're all afraid that we didn't quite get it right. And it feels like the stakes are so high. By we - what if we made a mistake?
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I do play tennis, but I don't really like competition. I'm supposed to be so intense, but I hate competition.
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I worry that by losing my temper so much and being so harsh and yelling so much that, by example, I will have taught my daughters to be that way, and I'm now constantly telling them not to do that.
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I think the biggest difference is that I've noticed Western parents seem much more concerned about their children's psyches, their self-esteem, whereas tough immigrant parents assume strength rather than fragility in their children and therefore behave completely differently.
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The Chinese model calls for giving your kids very little choice - and I've come to see that you can go too far with that. On the other hand, I also believe that Western parents sometimes give their young kids too much choice.
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Be modest, be humble, be simple.
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I think there are many ways to raise great kids. From what I can tell, Ayelet Waldman's kids are interesting, strong, and happy, and if that's the case, that's good parenting.
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Real self-esteem has to be earned. I also believe in virtuous circles, like, nothing is fun until you are good at it. It is great if you can instill in children the ability to not give up, to have a work ethic.
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There's nothing better for building confidence than learning you can do something you thought you couldn't.
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Once you get to the Enlightenment, the way that powers get to be hyperpowers isn't just by conquest. It's through commerce and innovation. Societies like the Dutch Republic and the United States used tolerance to become a magnet for enterprising immigrants.
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Be modest, be humble, be simple.Make sure you come in first so that you have something to be humble about.
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Questioning authority is, I think, a great thing to instill in children. I just didn't have enough of that when I was little.
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Western parents worry a lot about their children's self-esteem. But as a parent, one of the worst things you can do for your child's self-esteem is to let them give up. On the flip side, there's nothing better for building confidence than learning you can do something you thought you couldn't.
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I'm a proud strict mom and, you know, I'm really proud of the two daughters I've raised. And I'm especially proud of my relationship with them. We're very close. I think we're good friends.
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I once won a second prize in a history concert. My parents came to the ceremony. Somebody else had won the prize for best all-around student. Afterwards my father said to me, 'Never, ever disgrace me like that again.' When I tell my Western friends, they are aghast. But I adore my father. It didn't knock my self-esteem at all.
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Parenting is the hardest thing I have ever done. I tried to find the balance between the strict, traditional Chinese way I was raised, which I think can be too harsh, and what I see as a tendency in the West to be too permissive and indulgent. If I could do it all again, I would, with some adjustments.
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When I was little, my parents really only wanted me to be a scientist or a doctor they had never even heard of law school. I think even these days if you were to tell your mother you want to be a fashion designer, or an artist or a writer, a lot of Asian parents would be alarmed because they don't think that's a secure career.
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The most successful hyperpowers are the ones where there was actual intermixing. Tang dynasty China was Chinas golden age, and contrary to what I was told when I was growing up, Tang China was founded by a man who by todays standards was no more than half Chinese. It was a mixed-blood dynasty that pulled in barbarians from the steppe.
Amy Chua