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A king's staff of office, the sign and symbol of his authority. It was originally a mace with which the sovereign admonished his jester and vetoed ministerial measures by breaking the bones of their proponents.

Ambrose Bierce

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Ambrose Bierce
Born: 1842
Born: June 24
Aphorist
Journalist
Poet
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Meigs County
Ohio
Dod Grile
William Herman
Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce
Ambrose Bierce
Breaking
Admonished
Symbols
Proponents
Bones
Jester
Sign
Originally
King
Measures
Kings
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Vetoed
Authority
Sovereign
Ministerial
Office
Staff
Mace

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WITCH, n. (1) Any ugly and repulsive old woman, in a wicked league with the devil. (2) A beautiful and attractive young woman, in wickedness a league beyond the devil.
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Least said is soon disavowed.
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BEG, v. To ask for something with an earnestness proportioned to the belief that it will not be given.
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Don't board with the devil if you wish to be fat.
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RUBBISH, n. Worthless matter, such as the religions, philosophies, literatures, arts and sciences of the tribes infesting the regions lying due south from Boreaplas.
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The most intolerant advocate is he who is trying to convince himself.
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A less popular name for the Second Person of that delectable newspaper Trinity, the Roomer, the Bedder, and the Mealer.
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Bacchus, n.: A convenient deity invented by the ancients as an excuse for getting drunk.
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An aged Burgundy runs with a beardless Port. I cherish the fancy that Port speaks sentences of wisdom, Burgundy sings the inspired Ode.
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RASCALITY, n. Stupidity militant. The activity of a clouded intellect.
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ILLUSTRIOUS, adj. Suitably placed for the shafts of malice, envy and detraction.
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EXTINCTION, n. The raw material out of which theology created the future state.
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INCOMPATIBILITY, n. In matrimony a similarity of tastes, particularly the taste for domination. Incompatibility may, however, consist of a meek-eyed matron living just around the corner. It has even been known to wear a moustache.
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Don't steal thou'lt never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.
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One engaged in a commercial pursuit. A commercial pursuit is one in which the thing pursued is a dollar.
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True, more than a half of the green graves in the Grafton cemetery are marked Unknown, and sometimes it occurs that one thinks of the contradiction involved in honoring the memory of him of whom no memory remains to honor but the attempt seems to do no great harm to the living, even to the logical.
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Justice is a commodity which in a more or less adulterated condition the State sells to the citizen as a reward for his allegiance, taxes and personal service.
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Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
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TEDIUM, n. Ennui, the state or condition of one that is bored. Many fanciful derivations of the word have been affirmed, but so high an authority as Father Jape says that it comes from a very obvious source --the first words of the ancient Latin hymn _Te Deum Laudamus_. In this apparently natural derivation there is something that saddens.
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According to the most trustworthy statistics the number of adult Dullards in the United States is but little short of thirty millions, including the statisticians.
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