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ELECTOR, n. One who enjoys the sacred privilege of voting for the man of another man's choice.

Ambrose Bierce

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Ambrose Bierce
Born: 1842
Born: June 24
Aphorist
Journalist
Poet
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Meigs County
Ohio
Dod Grile
William Herman
Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce
Ambrose Bierce
Privilege
Sacred
Choice
Choices
Enjoy
Another
Men
Enjoys
Voting

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Famous, adj.: Conspicuously miserable.
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WITCH, n. (1) Any ugly and repulsive old woman, in a wicked league with the devil. (2) A beautiful and attractive young woman, in wickedness a league beyond the devil.
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PANTALOONS, n. A nether habiliment of the adult civilized male. The garment is tubular and unprovided with hinges at the points of flexion. Supposed to have been invented by a humorist. Called trousers by the enlightened and pants by the unworthy.
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MONARCHICAL GOVERNMENT, n. Government.
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LAP, n. One of the most important organs of the female system - an admirable provision of nature for the repose of infancy, but chiefly useful in rural festivities to support plates of cold chicken and heads of adult males.
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actually, adv. Perhaps possibly.
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DAY, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent. This period is divided into two parts, the day proper and the night, or day improper - the former devoted to sins of business, the latter consecrated to the other sort.
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PLAGIARIZE, v. To take the thought or style of another writer whom one has never, never read.
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CANNON, n. An instrument employed in the rectification of national boundaries.
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Molecule, n.: The ultimate, indivisible unit of matter. It is distinguished from the corpuscle, also the ultimate, indivisible unit of matter, by a closer resemblance to the atom, also the ultimate, indivisible unit of matter ... The ion differs from the molecule, the corpuscle and the atom in that it is an ion.
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IMAGINATION, n. A warehouse of facts, with poet and liar in joint ownership.
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PANTOMIME, n. A play in which the story is told without violence to the language. The least disagreeable form of dramatic action.
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Academe, n.: An ancient school where morality and philosophy were taught. Academy, n.: A modern school where football is taught.
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New York is too strenuous for me it gets on my nerves.
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REPUBLIC, n. A nation in which, the thing governing and the thing governed being the same, there is only a permitted authority to enforce an optional obedience.
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A modern school where football is taught.
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FORCE, n. Force is but might, the teacher said p/ That definition's just./ The boy said naught but throught instead,/ Remembering his pounded head:/ Force is not might but must!
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The poor man's price of admittance to the favor of the rich is his self-respect.
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If every hypocrite in the United States were to break his leg to-day the country could be successfully invaded to-morrow by the warlike hypocrites of Canada.
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Enthusiasm - a distemper of youth, curable by small doses of repentance in connection with outward applications of experience.
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