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A comely female inhabiting the Mohammedan Paradise to make things cheery for the good Mussulman, whose belief in her existence marks a noble discontent with his earthly spouse, whom he denies a soul.
Ambrose Bierce
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Ambrose Bierce
Born: 1842
Born: June 24
Aphorist
Journalist
Poet
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Meigs County
Ohio
Dod Grile
William Herman
Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce
Ambrose Bierce
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A man is the sum of his ancestors to reform him you must begin with a dead ape and work downward through a million graves.
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The most intolerant advocate is he who is trying to convince himself.
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An absolute monarchy is one in which the sovereign does as he pleases so long as he pleases the assassins.
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RIGHTEOUSNESS, n. A sturdy virtue that was once found among the Pantidoodles inhabiting the lower part of the peninsula of Oque. Some feeble attempts were made by returned missionaries to introduce it into several European countries . .
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LOGANIMITY, n. The disposition to endure injury with meek forbearance while maturing a plan of revenge.
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No country is so wild and difficult but men will make it a theater of war.
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BEG, v. To ask for something with an earnestness proportioned to the belief that it will not be given.
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Theology is a thing of unreason altogether, an edifice of assumptions and dreams, a superstructure without a substructure
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It is evident that skepticism, while it makes no actual change in man, always makes him feel better.
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Inventor: A person who makes an ingenious arrangement of wheels, levers and springs, and believes it civilization.
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HASH: There is no definition for this word - nobody knows what hash is.
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An army's bravest men are its cowards. The death which they would not meet at the hands of the enemy they will meet at the hands of their officers, with never a flinching.
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Idiot, n. A member of a large and powerful tribe whose influence in human affairs has always been dominant and controlling.
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REALISM, n. The art of depicting nature as it is seem by toads. The charm suffusing a landscape painted by a mole, or a story written by a measuring-worm.
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Income is the natural and rational gauge and measure of respectability.
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WASHINGTONIAN, n. A Potomac tribesman who exchanged the privilege of governing himself for the advantage of good government. In justice to him it should be said that he did not want to.
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Christian, n.: one who believes that the New Testament is a divinely inspired book admirably suited to the spiritual needs of his neighbor.
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moral, adj. Conforming to a local and mutable standard of right. Having the quality of general expediency.
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Gout, a physician's name for the rheumatism of a rich patient
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Truth - An ingenious compound of desirability and appearance.
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