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TABLE D'HOTE, n. A caterer's thrifty concession to the universal passion for irresponsibility.

Ambrose Bierce

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Ambrose Bierce
Born: 1842
Born: June 24
Aphorist
Journalist
Poet
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Meigs County
Ohio
Dod Grile
William Herman
Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce
Ambrose Bierce
Cooking
Caterer
Universal
Concession
Food
Thrifty
Irresponsibility
Passion
Concessions
Culinary
Table
Tables

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What this country needs what every country needs occasionally is a good hard bloody war to revive the vice of patriotism on which its existence as a nation depends.
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OUT-OF-DOORS, n. That part of one's environment upon which no government has been able to collect taxes. Chiefly useful to inspire poets.
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MOUTH, n. In man, the gateway to the soul in woman, the outlet of the heart.
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Laziness. Unwarranted repose of manner in a person of low degree.
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Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.
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SIREN, n. One of several musical prodigies famous for a vain attempt to dissuade Odysseus from a life on the ocean wave. Figuratively, any lady of splendid promise, dissembled purpose and disappointing performance.
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OPERA, n. A play representing life in another world, whose inhabitants have no speech but song, no motions but gestures and no postures but attitudes.
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DIGESTION, n. The conversion of victuals into virtues. When the process is imperfect, vices are evolved instead - a circumstance from which that wicked writer, Dr. Jeremiah Blenn, infers that the ladies are the greater sufferers from dyspepsia.
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INTIMACY, n. A relation into which fools are providentially drawn for their mutual destruction.
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Ability is commonly found to consist mainly in a high degree of solemnity.
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PALMISTRY, n. The 947th method . . . of obtaining money by false pretences [by] reading character in the wrinkles [of] the hand. The pretence is not altogether false. . . for the wrinkles in every hand submitted plainly spell the word dupe.
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Incompatibility. In matrimony a similarity of tastes, particularly the taste for domination.
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HARMONISTS, n. A sect of Protestants, now extinct, who came from Europe in the beginning of the last century and were distinguished for the bitterness of their internal controversies and dissensions.
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NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.
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