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The wife, or bitter half.
Ambrose Bierce
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Ambrose Bierce
Born: 1842
Born: June 24
Aphorist
Journalist
Poet
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Meigs County
Ohio
Dod Grile
William Herman
Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce
Ambrose Bierce
Bitter
Wife
Half
More quotes by Ambrose Bierce
HYDRA, n. A kind of animal that the ancients catalogued under many heads.
Ambrose Bierce
Nominee. A modest gentleman shrinking from the distinction of private life and diligently seeking the honorable obscurity of public office.
Ambrose Bierce
Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.
Ambrose Bierce
WINE, n.Fermented grape-juice known to the Women's Christian Union as liquor, sometimes as rum. Wine, madam, is God's next best gift to man.
Ambrose Bierce
ORTHOGRAPHY, n. The science of spelling by the eye instead of the ear.
Ambrose Bierce
Battle, n., A method of untying with the teeth a political knot that would not yield to the tongue.
Ambrose Bierce
Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one's own opinion.
Ambrose Bierce
Present, n. That part of eternity dividing the domain of disappointment from the realm of hope.
Ambrose Bierce
LIMB, n. The branch of a tree or the leg of an American woman.
Ambrose Bierce
GOOSE, n. A bird that supplies quills for writing. These [quills] when inked and drawn mechanically across paper by a person called an author, there results a very fair and accurate transcript of the fowl's thought and feeling.
Ambrose Bierce
Adolescence: A stage between infancy and adultery.
Ambrose Bierce
ENTERTAINMENT, n. Any kind of amusement whose inroads stop short of death by injection.
Ambrose Bierce
ETHNOLOGY, n. The science that treats of the various tribes of Man, as robbers, thieves, swindlers, dunces, lunatics, idiots and ethnologists.
Ambrose Bierce
I believe we shall come to care about people less and less. The more people one knows the easier it becomes to replace them. It's one of the curses of London.
Ambrose Bierce
Ambition. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by friends when dead.
Ambrose Bierce
Conversation: A fair for the display of the minor mental commodities, each exhibitor being too intent upon the arrangement of his own wares to observe those of his neighbor.
Ambrose Bierce
Friendless. Having no favors to bestow. Destitute of fortune. Addicted to utterance of truth and common sense.
Ambrose Bierce
The liberality of one who has much, in permitting one who has nothing to get all that he can.
Ambrose Bierce
In theology, the state of a luckless mortal prenatally damned. The doctrine of reprobation was taught by Calvin, whose joy in it was somewhat marred by the sad sincerity of his conviction that although some are foredoomed to perdition, others are predestined to salvation.
Ambrose Bierce
Noise: a stench in the ear.
Ambrose Bierce