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LAST, n. A shoemaker's implement, named by a frowning Providence as opportunity to the maker of puns.
Ambrose Bierce
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Ambrose Bierce
Born: 1842
Born: June 24
Aphorist
Journalist
Poet
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Meigs County
Ohio
Dod Grile
William Herman
Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce
Ambrose Bierce
Opportunity
Frowning
Implement
Maker
Named
Providence
Makers
Shoemaker
Lasts
Puns
Last
Pun
More quotes by Ambrose Bierce
Aborigines, n.: Persons of little worth found cumbering the soil of a newly discovered country. They soon cease to cumber they fertilize.
Ambrose Bierce
Prejudice - a vagrant opinion without visible means of support.
Ambrose Bierce
Self-denial is indulgence of a propensity to forego.
Ambrose Bierce
Cat: a soft indestructible automaton provided by nature to be kicked when things go wrong in the domestic circle.
Ambrose Bierce
Age is provident because the less future we have the more we fear it.
Ambrose Bierce
The quality that distinguishes love without knowledge.
Ambrose Bierce
The poor man's price of admittance to the favor of the rich is his self-respect.
Ambrose Bierce
HOMŒOPATHIST, n. The humorist of the medical profession.
Ambrose Bierce
WOMAN, n. An animal usually living in the vicinity of Man, and having a rudimentary susceptibility to domestication.
Ambrose Bierce
Age, with his eyes in the back of his head, thinks it wisdom to see the bogs through which he has floundered.
Ambrose Bierce
Economy, n. Purchasing the barrel of whiskey that you do not need for the price of the cow that you cannot afford.
Ambrose Bierce
RIDICULE, n. Words designed to show that the person of whom they are uttered is devoid of the dignity of character distinguishing him who utters them.
Ambrose Bierce
Rome has seven sacraments, but the Protestant churches, being less prosperous, feel that they can afford only two, and these of inferior sanctity.
Ambrose Bierce
The god of the world's leading religion.
Ambrose Bierce
Censor, n. An officer of certain governments, employed to supress the works of genius. Among the Romans the censor was an inspector of public morals, but the public morals of modern nations will not bear inspection.
Ambrose Bierce
VANITY, n. The tribute of a fool to the worth of the nearest ass.
Ambrose Bierce
Barometer, n.: An ingenious instrument which indicates what kind of weather we are having.
Ambrose Bierce
CAVILER, n. A critic of our own work.
Ambrose Bierce
To seek a justification for a decision already made.
Ambrose Bierce
mine, adj. Belonging to me if I can hold or seize it.
Ambrose Bierce
