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K, n. A consonant originally precisely that of our H, but altered to its present shape to commemorate the destruction of [one of two lofty columns in] the great temple of Jarute.

Ambrose Bierce

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Ambrose Bierce
Born: 1842
Born: June 24
Aphorist
Journalist
Poet
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Meigs County
Ohio
Dod Grile
William Herman
Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce
Ambrose Bierce
Great
Temple
Temples
Consonant
Precisely
Commemorate
Shape
Consonants
Destruction
Columns
Shapes
Originally
Present
Lofty
Two
Altered

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LIVER, n. A large red organ thoughtfully provided by nature to be bilious with. The liver is heaven's best gift to the goose without it that bird would be unable to supply us with the Strasbourg pate.
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PIANO, n. A parlor utensil for subduing the impenitent visitor. It is operated by depressing the keys of the machine and the spirits of the audience.
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Men who expect universal peace through invention of destructive weapons of war are no wiser than one who, noting the improvement of agricultural implements, should prophesy an end to the tilling of the soil.
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Forgetfulness - a gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscience.
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PILLORY, n. A mechanical device for inflicting personal distinction - prototype of the modern newspaper conducted by persons of austere virtues and blameless lives.
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Doubt is the father of invention.
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To Dogmatism the Spirit of Inquiry is the same as the Spirit of Evil.
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EMOTION, n. A prostrating disease caused by a determination of the heart to the head. It is sometimes accompanied by a copious discharge of hydrated chloride of sodium from the eyes.
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Learning, n. The kind of ignorance distinguishing the studious.
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RECONCILIATION, n. A suspension of hostilities. An armed truce for the purpose of digging up the dead.
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MONARCH, n. A person engaged in reigning. Formerly the monarch ruled, as the derivation of the word attests, and as many subjects have had occasion to learn.
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ENVY, n. Emulation adapted to the meanest capacity.
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There would be far fewer accidents if we could only teach telephone poles to be more careful.
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LEAD, n. A heavy blue-gray metal much used in giving stability to light lovers - particularly to those who love not wisely but other men's wives.
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resolute, adj. Obstinate in a course that we approve.
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One who, professing virtues that he does not respect, secures the advantage of seeming to be what he despises.
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Advice: The suggestions you give someone else which you hope will work for your benefit.
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GUILLOTINE, n. A machine which makes a Frenchman shrug his shoulders with good reason.
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PROJECTILE, n. The final arbiter in international disputes. With the growth of prudence in military affairs the projectile came more and more into favor, and is now held in high esteem by the most courageous.
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Theology is a thing of unreason altogether, an edifice of assumptions and dreams, a superstructure without a substructure
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