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plagiarism, n. A literary coincidence compounded of a discreditable priority and an honorable subsequence.

Ambrose Bierce

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Ambrose Bierce
Born: 1842
Born: June 24
Aphorist
Journalist
Poet
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Meigs County
Ohio
Dod Grile
William Herman
Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce
Ambrose Bierce
Literary
Priorities
Discreditable
Compounded
Plagiarism
Priority
Coincidence
Honorable

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Meekness: Uncommon patience in planning a revenge that is worth while.
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The hardest tumble a man can make is to fall over his own bluff.
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INGRATE, n. One who receives a benefit from another, or is otherwise an object of charity.
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A less popular name for the Second Person of that delectable newspaper Trinity, the Roomer, the Bedder, and the Mealer.
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ROPE, n. An obsolescent appliance for reminding assassins that they too are mortal. It is put about the neck and remains in place one's whole life long.
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WITCH, n. (1) Any ugly and repulsive old woman, in a wicked league with the devil. (2) A beautiful and attractive young woman, in wickedness a league beyond the devil.
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MISERICORDE, n. A dagger which in mediaeval warfare was used by the foot soldier to remind an unhorsed knight that he was mortal.
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ILLUSTRIOUS, adj. Suitably placed for the shafts of malice, envy and detraction.
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CEMETERY, n. An isolated suburban spot where mourners match lies, poets write at a target and stone-cutters spell for a wager.
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GNU, n. An animal of South Africa, which in its domesticated state resembles a horse, a buffalo and a stag. In its wild condition it is something like a thunderbolt, an earthquake and a cyclone.
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PRESBYTERIAN, n. One who holds the conviction that the government authorities of the Church should be called presbyters.
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When you are ill make haste to forgive your enemies, for you may recover.
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UNIVERSALIST, n. One who forgoes the advantage of a Hell for persons of another faith.
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PLATONIC, adj. Pertaining to the philosophy of Socrates. Platonic Love is a fool's name for the affection between a disability and a frost.
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Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
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An ingenious compound of desirability and appearance. Discovery of truth is the sole purpose of philosophy, which is the most ancient occupation of the human mind and has a fair prospect of existing with increasing activity to the end of time.
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Absence blots people out. We really have no absent friends.
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NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.
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When in Rome, do as Rome does.
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LECTURER, n. One with his hand in your pocket, his tongue in your ear and his faith in your patience.
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