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REVOLUTION, n. A bursting of the boilers which usually takes place when the safety valve of public discussion is closed.
Ambrose Bierce
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Ambrose Bierce
Born: 1842
Born: June 24
Aphorist
Journalist
Poet
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Meigs County
Ohio
Dod Grile
William Herman
Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce
Ambrose Bierce
Revolution
Usually
Boiler
Takes
Valve
Public
Bursting
Place
Censorship
Closed
Discussion
Safety
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MERCY, n. An attribute beloved of detected offenders.
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LAST, n. A shoemaker's implement, named by a frowning Providence as opportunity to the maker of puns.
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JOSS-STICKS- Small sticks burned by the Chinese in their pagan tomfoolery, in imitation of certain sacred rites of our holy religion.
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The poor man's price of admittance to the favor of the rich is his self-respect.
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SYLLOGISM, n. A logical formula consisting of a major and a minor assumption and an inconsequent.
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Kiss. n. A word invented by the poets as a rhyme for bliss.
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Barometer, n.: An ingenious instrument which indicates what kind of weather we are having.
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BEGGAR, n. One who has relied on the assistance of his friends.
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Women of genius commonly have masculine faces, figures and manners. In transplanting brains to an alien soil God leaves a little of the original earth clinging to the roots.
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PLEONASM, n. An army of words escorting a corporal of thought.
Ambrose Bierce
REPRESENTATIVE, n. In national politics, a member of the Lower House in this world, and without discernible hope of promotion in the next.
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Patience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtue.
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A king's staff of office, the sign and symbol of his authority. It was originally a mace with which the sovereign admonished his jester and vetoed ministerial measures by breaking the bones of their proponents.
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To the eye of failure success is an accident.
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GUNPOWDER, n. An agency employed by civilized nations for the settlement of disputes which might become troublesome if left unadjusted.
Ambrose Bierce
GEOGRAPHER, n. A chap who can tell you offhand the difference between the outside of the world and the inside.
Ambrose Bierce
Coronation: The ceremony of investing a sovereign with the outward and visible signs of his divine right to be blown skyhigh with a dynamite bomb.
Ambrose Bierce
He who thinks with difficulty believes with alacrity.
Ambrose Bierce
Behavior, n. Conduct, as determined, not by principle, but by breeding.
Ambrose Bierce
REPARATION, n. Satisfaction that is made for a wrong and deducted from the satisfaction felt in committing it.
Ambrose Bierce
