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Magpie, n.: A bird whose theivish disposition suggested to someone that it might be taught to talk.

Ambrose Bierce

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Ambrose Bierce
Born: 1842
Born: June 24
Aphorist
Journalist
Poet
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Meigs County
Ohio
Dod Grile
William Herman
Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce
Ambrose Bierce
Bird
Whose
Taught
Talk
Someone
Magpie
Might
Magpies
Suggested
Disposition

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Democracy is defended in 3 stages. Ballot Box, Jury Box, Cartridge Box.
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CEMETERY, n. An isolated suburban spot where mourners match lies, poets write at a target and stone-cutters spell for a wager.
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A subsidiary Deity designed to catch the overflow and surplus of the world's worship . . . . [H]is master works for the means wherewith to purchase the idle wag of the Solomonic tail, seasoned with a look of tolerant recognition.
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Cynicism is that blackguard defect of vision which compels us to see the world as it is, instead of as it should be.
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MATERIAL, adj. Having an actual existence, as distinguished from an imaginary one. Important.
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ADAGE, n. Boned wisdom for weak teeth.
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Brain: an apparatus with which we think we think.
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Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.
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Truth - An ingenious compound of desirability and appearance.
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EFFECT, n. The second of two phenomena which always occur together in the same order. The first, called a Cause, is said to generate the other-which is no more sensible than it would be for one who has never seen a dog except in pursuit of a rabbit to declare the rabbit the cause of the dog.
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A certain nervous disorder afflicting the young and inexperienced.
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The ghost is the outward and visible signs of an inward fear.
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Damning, with bell, book and candle / Some sinner whose opinions are a scandal. / A rite permitting Satan to enslave him / Forever, and forbidding Christ to save him.
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