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Loquacity, n. A disorder which renders the sufferer unable to curb his tongue when you wish to talk.

Ambrose Bierce

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Ambrose Bierce
Born: 1842
Born: June 24
Aphorist
Journalist
Poet
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Meigs County
Ohio
Dod Grile
William Herman
Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce
Ambrose Bierce
Unable
Disorder
Tongue
Talk
Wish
Sufferer
Sufferers
Renders
Curb

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Patriotism, n. Combustible rubbish ready to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name. In Dr. Johnson's famous dictionary patriotism is defined as the last resort of a scoundrel. With all due respect to an enlightened but inferior lexicographer I beg to submit it is the first.
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Even the laws of justice themselves cannot subsist without mixture of injustice.
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INCOMPOSSIBLE, adj. Unable to exist if something else exists. Two things are incompossible when the world of being has scope enough for one of them, but not enough for both - as Walt Whitman's poetry and God's mercy to man.
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HURRICANE, n. An atmospheric demonstration once very common but now generally abandoned for the tornado and cyclone. The hurricane is still in popular use in the West Indies and is preferred by certain old- fashioned sea-captains.
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MONARCHICAL GOVERNMENT, n. Government.
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CRAYFISH, n. A small crustacean very much resembling the lobster, but less indigestible.
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We submit to the majority because we have to. But we are not compelled to call our attitude of subjection a posture of respect.
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NEWTONIAN, Pertaining to a philosophy of the universe invented by Newton, who discovered that an apple will fall to the ground, but was unable to say why. His successors and disciples have advanced so far as to be able to say when.
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Inventor: A person who makes an ingenious arrangement of wheels, levers and springs, and believes it civilization.
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DISCRIMINATE, v.i. To note the particulars in which one person or thing is, if possible, more objectionable than another.
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DISABUSE, v.t. To present your neighbor with another and better error than the one which he has deemed advantageous to embrace.
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PHRENOLOGY, n. The science of picking the pocket through the scalp. It consists in locating and exploiting the organ that one is a dupe with.
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Heaven lies about us in our infancy and the world begins lying about us pretty soon afterward.
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Happiness has not to all the same name: to Youth she is known as the Future Age knows her as the Dream.
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YOUTH, n. The Period of Possibility, when Archimedes finds a fulcrum, Cassandra has a following and seven cities compete for the honor of endowing a living Homer.
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A miracle is an act or event out of the order of nature and unaccountable, as beating a normal hand of four kings and an ace with four aces and a king.
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Painting, n.: The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather, and exposing them to the critic.
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If you would be accounted great by your contemporaries, be not too much greater than they.
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When publicly censured our first instinct is to make everybody a codefendant.
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