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LIMB, n. The branch of a tree or the leg of an American woman.

Ambrose Bierce

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Ambrose Bierce
Born: 1842
Born: June 24
Aphorist
Journalist
Poet
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Meigs County
Ohio
Dod Grile
William Herman
Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce
Ambrose Bierce
Branch
Limbs
Branches
Legs
Tree
American
Woman
Women
Limb

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Rome has seven sacraments, but the Protestant churches, being less prosperous, feel that they can afford only two, and these of inferior sanctity.
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Experience is a revelation in the light of which we renounce our errors of youth for those of age.
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picture, n. A representation in two dimensions of something wearisome in three.
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PICKANINNY, n. The young of the Procyanthropos, or Americanus dominans. It is small, black and charged with political fatalities.
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Idiot, n. A member of a large and powerful tribe whose influence in human affairs has always been dominant and controlling.
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The covers of this book are too far apart.
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ANTIPATHY, n. The sentiment inspired by one's friend's friend.
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VANITY, n. The tribute of a fool to the worth of the nearest ass.
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COMMENDATION n. The tribute that we pay to achievements that resembles but do not equal our own.
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Clarinet n. An instrument of torture operated by a person with cotton in his ears. There are two instruments worse than a clarinet – two clarinets.
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What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would ruin the country.
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ORPHAN, n. A living person whom death has deprived of the power of filial ingratitude . . .
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Patience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtue.
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Christians and camels receive their burdens kneeling.
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New York is too strenuous for me it gets on my nerves.
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Kiss. n. A word invented by the poets as a rhyme for bliss.
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MAN, n. An animal so lost in rapturous contemplation of what he thinks he is as to overlook what he indubitably ought to be.
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PHOTOGRAPH, n. A picture painted by the sun without instruction in art. It is a little better than the work of an Apache, but not quite so good as that of a Cheyenne.
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REALITY, n. The dream of a mad philosopher. That which would remain in the cupel if one should assay a phantom. The nucleus of a vacuum.
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PERORATION, n. The explosion of an oratorical rocket. It dazzles, but to an observer having the wrong kind of nose its most conspicuous peculiarity is the smell of the several kinds of powder used in preparing it.
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