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WRATH, n. Anger of a superior quality and degree, appropriate to exalted characters and momentous occasions as, the wrath of God, the day of wrath, etc. . . .
Ambrose Bierce
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Ambrose Bierce
Born: 1842
Born: June 24
Aphorist
Journalist
Poet
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Meigs County
Ohio
Dod Grile
William Herman
Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce
Ambrose Bierce
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Superior
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Opposition, n. In politics the party that prevents the government from running amuck by hamstringing it.
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OBSERVATORY, n. A place where astronomers conjecture away the guesses of their predecessors.
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REBEL, n. A proponent of a new misrule who has failed to establish it.
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Fear has no brains it is an idiot.
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MONARCHICAL GOVERNMENT, n. Government.
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ART, n. This word has no definition. Its origin is related by the ingenious Father Gassalasca Jape as One day a wag - what would the wretch be at? Shifted a letter of the cipher RAT, And said it was a god's name! . . .
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Condole - to show that bereavement is a smaller evil than sympathy.
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art, n. This word has no definition.
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One who, professing virtues that he does not respect, secures the advantage of seeming to be what he despises.
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REASON, v.i. To weight probabilities in the scales of desire.
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A nutritious substance supplied by a bountiful Providence for the fattening of the poor.
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RITE, n. A religious or semi-religious ceremony fixed by law, precept or custom, with the essential oil of sincerity carefully squeezed out of it.
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ORTHOGRAPHY, n. The science of spelling by the eye instead of the ear.
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Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited.
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Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
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TEDIUM, n. Ennui, the state or condition of one that is bored. Many fanciful derivations of the word have been affirmed, but so high an authority as Father Jape says that it comes from a very obvious source --the first words of the ancient Latin hymn _Te Deum Laudamus_. In this apparently natural derivation there is something that saddens.
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Patriotism is as fierce as a fever, pitiless as the grave, blind as a stone, and irrational as a headless hen.
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Monsieur Franqulin, inventor of electricity. This illustrious savant, after having made several voyages around the world, died on the Sandwich Islands and was devoured by savages, of whom not a single fragment was ever recovered.
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HUMORIST, n. A plague that would have softened down the hoar austerity of Pharaoh's heart and persuaded him to dismiss Israel with his best wishes, cat-quick.
Ambrose Bierce
MALTHUSIAN, adj. Pertaining to Malthus and his doctrines, who believed in artificially limiting population, but found that it could not be done by talking. Herod of Judea, all the famous soldiers have been practical exponents of the Malthusian idea.
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