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WOMAN, n. An animal usually living in the vicinity of Man, and having a rudimentary susceptibility to domestication.

Ambrose Bierce

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Ambrose Bierce
Born: 1842
Born: June 24
Aphorist
Journalist
Poet
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Meigs County
Ohio
Dod Grile
William Herman
Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce
Ambrose Bierce
Men
Rudimentary
Life
Susceptibility
Vicinity
Usually
Animal
Woman
Living
Women
Domestication

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Witticism. A sharp and clever remark, usually quoted and seldom noted what the Philistine is pleased to call a joke.
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Eulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration to be dead.
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A total abstainer is one who abstains from everything but abstention, and especially from inactivity in the affairs of others.
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CUI BONO? [Latin] What good would that do me?
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The only distinction that democracies reward is a high degree of conformity.
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Irreligion - the principal one of the great faiths of the world.
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INGRATE, n. One who receives a benefit from another, or is otherwise an object of charity.
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EVANGELIST, n. A bearer of good tidings, particularly (in a religious sense) such as assure us of our own salvation and the damnation of our neighbors.
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Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
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You are not permitted to kill a woman who has wronged you, but nothing forbids you to reflect that she is growing older every minute.
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We must stop chasing dollars, stop lying, stop cheating, stop ignoring art, literature, and all the refining agencies and instrumentalities of civilization.
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Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.
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Optimism - the doctrine or belief that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly.
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INDIFFERENT, adj. Imperfectly sensible to distinctions among things.
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Boundary, n. In political geography, an imaginary line between two nations, separating the imaginary rights of one from the imaginary rights of another.
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The sum of religion, says Pythagoras, is to be like him thou worshipest. Had Pythagoras lived in our day he would have seen his mistake. The sum of modern religion is to make him thou worshipest like unto thyself.
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AUSTRALIA, n. A country lying in the South Sea, whose industrial and commercial development has been unspeakably retarded by an unfortunate dispute among geographers as to whether it is a continent or an island.
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Deliberation, n.: The act of examining one's bread to determine which side it is buttered on.
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Adolescence: The stage between puberty and adultery.
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A certain nervous disorder afflicting the young and inexperienced.
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