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Work: a dangerous disorder affecting high public functionaries who want to go fishing.
Ambrose Bierce
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Ambrose Bierce
Born: 1842
Born: June 24
Aphorist
Journalist
Poet
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Meigs County
Ohio
Dod Grile
William Herman
Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce
Ambrose Bierce
Dangerous
Affecting
Public
Lakes
High
Disorder
Work
Fishing
Fishes
Boat
Rivers
Sea
Functionaries
More quotes by Ambrose Bierce
Kindness n: A brief preface to ten volumes of exaction.
Ambrose Bierce
General, said the commander of the delinquent brigade, I am persuaded that any further display of valor by my troops will bring them into collision with the enemy.
Ambrose Bierce
DELEGATION, n. In American politics, an article of merchandise that comes in sets.
Ambrose Bierce
EXCEPTION, n. A thing which takes the liberty to differ from other things of its class, as an honest man, a truthful woman, etc.
Ambrose Bierce
SERIAL, n. A literary work, usually a story that is not true, creeping through several issues of a newspaper or magazine.
Ambrose Bierce
RUIN, v. To destroy. Specifically, to destroy a maid's belief in the virtue of maids.
Ambrose Bierce
ORTHOGRAPHY, n. The science of spelling by the eye instead of the ear.
Ambrose Bierce
OATH, n. In law, a solemn appeal to the Deity, made binding upon the conscience by a penalty for perjury.
Ambrose Bierce
Conversation: A fair for the display of the minor mental commodities, each exhibitor being too intent upon the arrangement of his own wares to observe those of his neighbor.
Ambrose Bierce
Hypocrisy: prejudice with a halo.
Ambrose Bierce
NON-COMBATANT, n. A dead Quaker.
Ambrose Bierce
PRE-EXISTENCE, n. An unnoted factor in creation.
Ambrose Bierce
Immoral is the judgment of the stalled ox on the gamboling lamb.
Ambrose Bierce
EVANGELIST, n. A bearer of good tidings, particularly (in a religious sense) such as assure us of our own salvation and the damnation of our neighbors.
Ambrose Bierce
CENTAUR, n. One of a race of persons who lived before the division of labor had been carried to such a pitch of differentiation, and who followed the primitive economic maxim, Every man his own horse.
Ambrose Bierce
Epitaph: An inscription on a tomb showing that virtues acquired by death have a retroactive effect.
Ambrose Bierce
CALUMNUS, n. A graduate of the School for Scandal.
Ambrose Bierce
FORCE, n. Force is but might, the teacher said p/ That definition's just./ The boy said naught but throught instead,/ Remembering his pounded head:/ Force is not might but must!
Ambrose Bierce
DEINOTHERIUM, n. An extinct pachyderm that flourished when the Pterodactyl was in fashion. The latter was a native of Ireland, its name being pronounced Terry Dactyl or Peter O'Dactyl, as the man pronouncing it may chance to have heard it spoken or seen it printed.
Ambrose Bierce
REAR, n. In American military matters, that exposed part of the army that is nearest to Congress.
Ambrose Bierce
