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MUMMY, n. - an ancient Egyptian handy, too, in museums in gratifying the vulgar curiosity that serves to distinguish man from the lower animals.

Ambrose Bierce

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Ambrose Bierce
Born: 1842
Born: June 24
Aphorist
Journalist
Poet
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Meigs County
Ohio
Dod Grile
William Herman
Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce
Ambrose Bierce
Lower
Mummy
Curiosity
Gratifying
Ancient
Egyptian
Animals
Handy
Animal
Distinguish
Men
Serves
Vulgar
Museums

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They say that hens do cackle loudest when there is nothing vital in the eggs they have laid.
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Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.
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Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
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Aborigines, n.: Persons of little worth found cumbering the soil of a newly discovered country. They soon cease to cumber they fertilize.
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Occident: The part of the world lying west (or east) of the Orient. It is largely inhabited by Christians, a powerful subtribe of the Hypocrites, whose principal industries are murder and cheating, which they are pleased to call war and commerce. These, also, are the principal industries of the Orient.
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UGLINESS, n. A gift of the gods to certain women, entailing virtue without humility.
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Example is better than following it.
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The clarinet is a musical instrument the only thing worse than which is two.
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