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Nominee. A modest gentleman shrinking from the distinction of private life and diligently seeking the honorable obscurity of public office.

Ambrose Bierce

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Ambrose Bierce
Born: 1842
Born: June 24
Aphorist
Journalist
Poet
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Meigs County
Ohio
Dod Grile
William Herman
Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce
Ambrose Bierce
Modest
Gentleman
Distinction
Seeking
Diligently
Private
Nominee
Office
Shrinking
Public
Obscurity
Life
Honorable

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A less popular name for the Second Person of that delectable newspaper Trinity, the Roomer, the Bedder, and the Mealer.
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A single swallow, it is said, devours ten millions of insects every year. The supplying of these insects I take to be a signal instance of the Creator's bounty in providing for the lives of His creatures.
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REACH, n. The radius of action of the human hand. The area within which it is possible (and customary) to gratify directly the propensity to provide.
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Learning, n. The kind of ignorance distinguishing the studious.
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Platitude: All that is mortal of a departed truth.
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A person of greater enterprise than discretion, who in embracing an opportunity has formed an unfortunate attachment.
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Book - Learning : The dunce's derisive term for all knowledge that transcends his own impertinent ignorance.
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Self-evident, adj. Evident to one's self and to nobody else.
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Riven and torn with cannon-shot, the trunks of the trees protruded bunches of splinters like hands, the fingers above the wound interlacing with those below.
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Pun: A form of wit, to which wise men stoop and fools aspire
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EMOTION, n. A prostrating disease caused by a determination of the heart to the head. It is sometimes accompanied by a copious discharge of hydrated chloride of sodium from the eyes.
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The hardest tumble a man can make is to fall over his own bluff.
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PHYSICIAN, n. One upon whom we set our hopes when ill and our dogs when well.
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Electricity is the power that causes all natural phenomena not known to be caused by something else
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General, said the commander of the delinquent brigade, I am persuaded that any further display of valor by my troops will bring them into collision with the enemy.
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HUMORIST, n. A plague that would have softened down the hoar austerity of Pharaoh's heart and persuaded him to dismiss Israel with his best wishes, cat-quick.
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USAGE, n. The First Person of the literary Trinity, the Second and Third being Custom and Conventionality. Imbued with a decent reverence for this Holy Triad an industrious writer may hope to produce books that will live as long as the fashion.
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A cheap and easy cynicism rails at everything. The master of the art accomplishes the formidable task of discrimination.
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ACKNOWLEDGE, v.t. To confess. Acknowledgment of one another's faults is the highest duty imposed by our love of truth.
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Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.
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