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ENVY, n. Emulation adapted to the meanest capacity.

Ambrose Bierce

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Ambrose Bierce
Born: 1842
Born: June 24
Aphorist
Journalist
Poet
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Meigs County
Ohio
Dod Grile
William Herman
Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce
Ambrose Bierce
Capacity
Emulation
Meanest
Envied
Adapted
Envy

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Bigamy, n. A mistake in taste for which the wisdom of the future will adjudge a punishment called trigamy.
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COMMERCE, n. A kind of transaction in which A plunders from B the goods of C, and for compensation B picks the pocket of D of money belonging to E.
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Experience is a revelation in the light of which we renounce our errors of youth for those of age.
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WHANGDEPOOTENAWAH, n. In the Ojibwa tongue, disaster an unexpected affliction that strikes hard.
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Age, with his eyes in the back of his head, thinks it wisdom to see the bogs through which he has floundered.
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HERMIT, n. A person whose vices and follies are not sociable.
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A trite popular saying, or proverb. (Figurative and colloquial.) So called because it makes its way into a wooden head. Following are examples of old saws fitted with new teeth.
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SYCOPHANT- One who approaches Greatness on his belly so that he may not be commanded to turn and be kicked. He is sometimes an editor.
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The fact that boys are allowed to exist at all is evidence of a remarkable Christian forebearance among men.
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What a woman most admires in a man is distinction among men. What a man most admires in a woman is devotion to himself.
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Patriotism: The first resort of a scoundrel.
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DEJEUNER, n. The breakfast of an American who has been in Paris. Variously pronounced.
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Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
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TALK, v.t. To commit an indiscretion without temptation, from an impulse without purpose.
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NIHILIST, n. A Russian who denies the existence of anything but Tolstoi. The leader of the school is Tolstoi.
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PHONOGRAPH, n. An irritating toy that restores life to dead noises.
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Disobey n:To celebrate with an appropriate ceremony the maturity of a command
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REVEILLE, n. A signal to sleeping soldiers to dream of battlefields no more, but get up and have their blue noses counted.
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The partisan strife in which the people of the country are permitted to periodically engage does not tend to the development of ugly traits of character, but merely discloses those that preexist.
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The only distinction that democracies reward is a high degree of conformity.
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