Quote

Heaven: A place where the wicked cease from troubling you with talk of their personal affairs, and the good listen with attention while you expound on yours.

Ambrose Bierce

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Ambrose Bierce
Born: 1842
Born: June 24
Aphorist
Journalist
Poet
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Meigs County
Ohio
Dod Grile
William Herman
Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce
Ambrose Bierce
Heaven
Wicked
Place
Affair
Good
Cease
Listen
Personal
Hell
Expound
Talk
Troubling
Attention
Affairs

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It is evident that skepticism, while it makes no actual change in man, always makes him feel better.
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I never said all Democrats were saloonkeepers. What I said was that all saloonkeepers are Democrats.
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Christians and camels receive their burdens kneeling.
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Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.
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Mad adj. Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence not conforming to standards of thought, speech, and action derived by the conformants from study of themselves at odds with the majority in short, unusual. It is noteworthy that persons are pronounced mad by officials destitute of evidence that they themselves are sane.
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Eulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration to be dead.
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Birth: The first and direst of all disasters.
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DISCUSSION, n. A method of confirming others in their errors.
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Definition: CONNOISSEUR, n. A specialist who knows everything about something and nothing about anything else.
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Uncommon extension of the fear of death.
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Reverence for the Supreme Being, based upon His supposed resemblance to man. The pig is taught by sermons and epistles / To think the God of Swine has snout and bristles.
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A large stone presented by the archangel Gabriel to the patriarch Abraham, and preserved at Mecca. The patriarch had perhaps asked the archangel for bread.
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The only distinction that democracies reward is a high degree of conformity.
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Kiss. n. A word invented by the poets as a rhyme for bliss.
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Battle, n., A method of untying with the teeth a political knot that would not yield to the tongue.
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HYENA, n. A beast held in reverence by some oriental nations from its habit of frequenting at night the burial-places of the dead. But the medical student does that
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The game of discontent has its rules, and he who disregards them cheats. It is not permitted to you to wish to add another's advantages or possessions to your own you are permitted only to wish to be another.
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ANTIPATHY, n. The sentiment inspired by one's friend's friend.
Ambrose Bierce