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Spring beckons! All things to the call respond the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

Ambrose Bierce

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Ambrose Bierce
Born: 1842
Born: June 24
Aphorist
Journalist
Poet
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Meigs County
Ohio
Dod Grile
William Herman
Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce
Ambrose Bierce
Things
Beckons
Springtime
Respond
Trees
Leaving
Spring
Tree
Call
Cashiers

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CALUMNUS, n. A graduate of the School for Scandal.
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GRAVE, n. A place in which the dead are laid to await the coming of the medical student.
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Belladonna, n.: In Italian a beautiful lady in English a deadly poison. A striking example of the essential identity of the two tongues.
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RUBBISH, n. Worthless matter, such as the religions, philosophies, literatures, arts and sciences of the tribes infesting the regions lying due south from Boreaplas.
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Witticism. A sharp and clever remark, usually quoted and seldom noted what the Philistine is pleased to call a joke.
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The furrier gets the skins of more foxes than asses.
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WINE, n.Fermented grape-juice known to the Women's Christian Union as liquor, sometimes as rum. Wine, madam, is God's next best gift to man.
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Introduction - a social ceremony invented by the devil for the gratification of his servants and the plaguing of his enemies.
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Fidelity - a virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.
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LIAR, n. One who tells an unpleasant truth.
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Anoint, v.: To grease a king or other great functionary already sufficiently slippery.
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MANNA, n. A food miraculously given to the Israelites in the wilderness. When it was no longer supplied to them they settled down and tilled the soil, fertilizing it, as a rule, with the bodies of the original occupants.
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A statesman who shakes the fruit trees of his neighbors - to dislodge the worms.
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WOMAN, n. An animal usually living in the vicinity of Man, and having a rudimentary susceptibility to domestication.
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The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling.
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EAT, v.i. To perform successively (and successfully) the functions of mastication, humectation, and deglutition.
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Liar: A lawyer with a roving commission.
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FORMA PAUPERIS. [Latin] In the character of a poor person - a method by which a litigant without money for lawyers is considerately permitted to lose his case.
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Empty wine bottles have a bad opinion of women.
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OPERA, n. A play representing life in another world, whose inhabitants have no speech but song, no motions but gestures and no postures but attitudes.
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