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Bacchus, n.: A convenient deity invented by the ancients as an excuse for getting drunk.

Ambrose Bierce

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Ambrose Bierce
Born: 1842
Born: June 24
Aphorist
Journalist
Poet
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Meigs County
Ohio
Dod Grile
William Herman
Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce
Ambrose Bierce
Invented
Drunk
Cooking
Bacchus
Excuse
Ancients
Ancient
Deity
Wine
Deities
Food
Convenient
Getting
Culinary

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When you are ill make haste to forgive your enemies, for you may recover.
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FORCE, n. Force is but might, the teacher said p/ That definition's just./ The boy said naught but throught instead,/ Remembering his pounded head:/ Force is not might but must!
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The palmist looks at the wrinkles made by closing the hand and says they signify character. The philosopher reads character by what the hand most loves to close upon.
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A person of greater enterprise than discretion, who in embracing an opportunity has formed an unfortunate attachment.
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As a means of dispensing formulated ignorance our boasted public school system is not without merit it spreads out education sufficiently thin to give everyone enough to make him a more competent fool than he would have been without it.
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ORTHOGRAPHY, n. The science of spelling by the eye instead of the ear.
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Work: a dangerous disorder affecting high public functionaries who want to go fishing.
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HASH: There is no definition for this word - nobody knows what hash is.
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A rabbit's foot may bring good luck to you, but it brought none to the rabbit.
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Brain, v. [as in to brain]: To rebuke bluntly, but not pointedly to dispel a source of error in an opponent.
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Cribbage, n. A substitute for conversation among those to whom nature has denied ideas.
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CUI BONO? [Latin] What good would that do me?
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