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It is evident that skepticism, while it makes no actual change in man, always makes him feel better.

Ambrose Bierce

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Ambrose Bierce
Born: 1842
Born: June 24
Aphorist
Journalist
Poet
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Meigs County
Ohio
Dod Grile
William Herman
Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce
Ambrose Bierce
Men
Actual
Literature
Makes
Change
Better
Feel
Feels
Skepticism
Always
Evident

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In this world one must have a name it prevents confusion, even when it does not establish identity. Some, though, are known by numbers, which also seem inadequate distinctions.
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A nation that will not enforce its laws has no claim to the respect and allegiance of its people.
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ZIGZAG, v.t. To move forward uncertainly, from side to side, as one carrying the white man's burden.
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Aristocrats: n. fellows that wear downy hats and clean shirts - guilty of education and suspected of bank accounts.
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GENEROUS, adj. Originally this word meant noble by birth and was rightly applied to a great multitude of persons. It now means noble by nature and is taking a bit of a rest.
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Fear has no brains it is an idiot.
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Trial. A formal inquiry designed to prove and put upon record the blameless characters of judges, advocates and jurors.
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Adolescence: The stage between puberty and adultery.
Ambrose Bierce
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DEJEUNER, n. The breakfast of an American who has been in Paris. Variously pronounced.
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Duck-bill, n. Your account at your restaurant during the canvas-back season.
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Dentist: a prestidigitator who, putting metal into your mouth, pulls coin out of your pocket.
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To be positive is to be mistaken at the top of one's voice.
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PLAGUE, n. In ancient times a general punishment of the innocent for admonition of their ruler, as in the familiar instance of Pharaoh the Immune. The plague today . . . is merely Nature's fortuitous manifestation of her purposeless objectionableness.
Ambrose Bierce
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LOVE, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage or by removal of the patient from the influences under which he incurred the disorder.
Ambrose Bierce
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PERORATION, n. The explosion of an oratorical rocket. It dazzles, but to an observer having the wrong kind of nose its most conspicuous peculiarity is the smell of the several kinds of powder used in preparing it.
Ambrose Bierce
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OBSERVATORY, n. A place where astronomers conjecture away the guesses of their predecessors.
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REFERENDUM, n. A law for submission of proposed legislation to a popular vote to learn the nonsensus of public opinion.
Ambrose Bierce
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Christians and camels receive their burdens kneeling.
Ambrose Bierce
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JESTER, n. An officer attached to the king's household to amuse the court by ludicrous actions and utterances . . . the king's own conduct and decrees [being] sufficiently ridiculous for the amusement not only of his court but of all mankind.
Ambrose Bierce
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CLOSE-FISTED, adj. Unduly desirous of keeping that which many meritorious persons wish to obtain.
Ambrose Bierce