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Jealous, adj. Unduly concerned about the preservation of that which can be lost only if not worth keeping.

Ambrose Bierce

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Ambrose Bierce
Born: 1842
Born: June 24
Aphorist
Journalist
Poet
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Meigs County
Ohio
Dod Grile
William Herman
Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce
Ambrose Bierce
Keeping
Losing
Concerned
Worth
Lost
Reality
Unduly
Preservation
Jealous

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YESTERDAY, n. The infancy of youth, the youth of manhood, the entire past of age.
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Hypocrisy: prejudice with a halo.
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Don't steal thou'lt never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.
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OSTRICH, n. A large bird to which (for its sins, doubtless) nature has denied that hinder toe . . . . The absence of a good working pair of wings is no defect, for, as has been ingeniously pointed out, the ostrich does not fly.
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A nutritious substance supplied by a bountiful Providence for the fattening of the poor.
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REACH, n. The radius of action of the human hand. The area within which it is possible (and customary) to gratify directly the propensity to provide.
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Introduction - a social ceremony invented by the devil for the gratification of his servants and the plaguing of his enemies.
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MUGWUMP, n. In politics one afflicted with self-respect and addicted to the vice of independence. A term of contempt.
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The circus a place where horses, ponies and elephants are permitted to see men, women and children acting the fool.
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RUBBISH, n. Worthless matter, such as the religions, philosophies, literatures, arts and sciences of the tribes infesting the regions lying due south from Boreaplas.
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Appetite, n. An instinct thoughtfully implanted by Providence as a solution to the labor question.
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Theology is a thing of unreason altogether, an edifice of assumptions and dreams, a superstructure without a substructure
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Selfish, adj. Devoid of consideration for the selfishness of others.
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ELEGY, n. A composition in verse, in which, without employing any of the methods of humor, the writer aims to produce in the reader's mind the dampest kind of dejection.
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REVEILLE, n. A signal to sleeping soldiers to dream of battlefields no more, but get up and have their blue noses counted.
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Aborigines, n.: Persons of little worth found cumbering the soil of a newly discovered country. They soon cease to cumber they fertilize.
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TRICHINOSIS, n. The pig's reply to proponents of porcophagy.
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CUI BONO? [Latin] What good would that do me?
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PITY, n. A failing sense of exemption, inspired by contrast.
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There are four kinds of Homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy.
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