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Beauty, n: the power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.

Ambrose Bierce

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Ambrose Bierce
Born: 1842
Born: June 24
Aphorist
Journalist
Poet
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Meigs County
Ohio
Dod Grile
William Herman
Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce
Ambrose Bierce
Charm
Scary
Lovers
Husband
Wife
Beauty
Terrifies
Woman
Charms
Power
Lover

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PITY, n. A failing sense of exemption, inspired by contrast.
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The wife, or bitter half.
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ARTLESSNESS, n. A certain engaging quality to which women attain by long study and severe practice upon the admiring male, who is pleased to fancy it resembles the candid simplicity of his young.
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The ghost is the outward and visible signs of an inward fear.
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MANICHEISM, n. The ancient Persian doctrine of an incessant warfare between Good and Evil. When Good gave up the fight the Persians joined the victorious Opposition.
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PROPHECY, n. The art and practice of selling one's credibility for future delivery.
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Belladonna, n.: In Italian a beautiful lady in English a deadly poison. A striking example of the essential identity of the two tongues.
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Distress: A disease incurred by exposure to the prosperity of a friend.
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A bad workman quarrels with the man who calls him that.
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Quill: An instrument of torture yielded by a goose and commonly weilded by as ass.
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Backbite: To ''speak of a man as you find him'' when he can't find you.
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Good-bye -- if you hear of my being stood up against a stone wall and shot to rags please know that I think that a pretty good way to depart this life. It beats old age, disease or falling down the cellar stairs.
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Optimism - the doctrine or belief that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly.
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BAIT, n. A preparation that renders the hook more palatable. The best kind is beauty.
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Immigrant: An unenlightened person who thinks one country better than another.
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NEIGHBOR, n. One whom we are commanded to love as ourselves, and who does all he knows how to make us disobedient.
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REDEMPTION, n. Deliverance of sinners from the penalty of their sin, through their murder of the deity against whom they sinned . . . . whoso believeth in it shall not perish, but have everlasting life in which to try to understand it.
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SYCOPHANT- One who approaches Greatness on his belly so that he may not be commanded to turn and be kicked. He is sometimes an editor.
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INFALAPSARIAN, n. One who ventures to believe that Adam need not have sinned unless he had a mind to - in opposition to the Supralapsarians, who hold that that luckless person's fall was decreed from the beginning.
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Male, A member of the unconsidered or negligible gender. The male of the human race is commonly known to the female as Mere Man. The Genus has two varieties: good providers and bad providers.
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