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Contemplating Christmas when you are isolated and far from home brings its own unique pain.

Amanda Lindhout

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Amanda Lindhout
Age: 43
Born: 1981
Born: June 12
Autobiographer
Humanitarian
Journalist
Scott
Pain
Home
Contemplating
Isolated
Christmas
Brings
Unique

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Every day I have many choices to make about who I want to be.
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Friendships that don't fit my life anymore have faded away, and new ones have come in.
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After being in captivity for so long, I can't begin to describe how wonderful it feels to be home in Canada.
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I am so proud to be a Canadian.
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I'm not afraid of IED's, bullets, mortars.
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Christmas was the one time of year when my brothers surfaced at home, when my parents and grandparents congregated to eat my mother's roast turkey.
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The same men who are placing all these outrageous restrictions on women’s freedoms in southern Somalia – that type of mentality – that’s what I had to deal with in captivity.
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We all waited on an afterlife. Only I planned to be alive for mine.
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I have watched lives change. I have seen women gain confidence.
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I, too, was carrying around my own fate. All the things I couldn't know sat somewhere inside, embroidered into me-maybe not quite fixed to the point of inevitability but waiting, in any event, for a chance to unspool.
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Women in Somalia face almost unimaginable oppression.
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I don't only long for the thrill of being in the middle of a war, I must understand it I must make other people understand.
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I swung from one place to the next, sometimes backward, sometimes forward, capitalizing on my own momentum, knowing that at some point my arms—or, more accurately, my quivering bank balance, accessed through foreign ATMs—would give out, and I’d fall to the ground.
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Maintaining my dignity is so important for me.
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I don't think I'm unusual in that, in my 20s, like many people, I felt invincible.
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Being in the dark, there's a real weight to it. It's heavy.
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Forgiving is not an easy thing to do.
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