Quote

If my wife made childhood obesity her mission and I signed a law making 1/8 cup of tomato paste a vegetable, I'd be sleeping on the sofa.

Alton Brown

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Alton Brown
Age: 62
Born: 1962
Born: July 30
Actor
Author
Chef
Cinematographer
Musician
Television Personality
Voice Actor
Writer
LA
California
Alton Crawford Walter Brown
Alton Crawford Brown
Making
Sleeping
Tomato
Made
Mission
Sofa
Cups
Sofas
Missions
Vegetable
Childhood
Tomatoes
Wife
Obesity
Sleep
Signed
Law
Vegetables
Paste

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I never spoke about politics, with the exception of Election Night.
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I only really fake it anymore with sommeliers who are being really snotty to me and I don't want to take their grief and so I try to do something to kind of throw them off or put them on the defensive, even if I don't know what I'm talking about
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The jewel of the lard is right around the kidneys. But this is a fat that has a very specific crystalline formation and a high melting point.
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A home cook who relies too much on a recipe is sort of like a pilot who reads the plane's instruction manual while flying.
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A pie dough comes together exactly like a biscuit only there is very, very little liquid and no leavening involved. Other than that, the same rules apply. My best advice: handle the dough as little as possible.
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I'm too tired to hate.
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When you're touring, you're constantly in motion.
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Remember, America: organization will set you free.
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Racism. It's ugly. Even in tubers.
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I love to have battles of the wits with people that can dish fast and dirty - and it leads to problems occasionally, 'cause I can sound mean without attempting to be mean.
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I feel a strong wakeup call and need to build social connections.
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Although I don't take myself very seriously, I do take my work extraordinarily seriously.
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It's funny, when you look back in history books or American cookery books, one of the reasons that the quinces and cranberries are used so often is because of their natural jelling properties.
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So I quit my job and went to the New England Culinary Institute for the full two years and worked in the restaurant industry after that until finally I thought I had a grasp on what I needed to do what I do.
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You know we fixate on the food so much itself: “Oh, the ultimate brownie or the ultimate this or that” -- well, let me tell you something: It’s all poop in about 12 hours, okay? The real power that food has is its ability to connect human beings to each other -- that’s the stuff right there and, to me, everything else is secondary to that.
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Now my wife may think she's locked me out of the kitchen but MacGyver's not my patron saint for nothing.
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I'm like a really goofy home ec teacher.
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Butter typically melts around, you know, 90 Fahrenheit, as opposed to about 20 degrees higher for lard. So what that means is that when you're working with it, the lard is going to stay more solid, which is great for flakiness.
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Well, you know, when you go into a restaurant, one of the scariest things is the wine list, so whenever I'm really feeling intimidated, I'll just pick a wine type, like a Chianti or Brunello or a Burgundy, and I'll pick a year that's missing and ask for that one.
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All that [replacing of fat] does is lead to dissatisfaction and I think that dissatisfaction results in overeating.
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