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I'm a filmmaker who decided to go to culinary school. All I picked up was the fact if I didn't understand what was going on with every single ingredient, I could be qualifying for, like, the lunch food job at my daughter's school.

Alton Brown

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Alton Brown
Age: 62
Born: 1962
Born: July 30
Actor
Author
Chef
Cinematographer
Musician
Television Personality
Voice Actor
Writer
LA
California
Alton Crawford Walter Brown
Alton Crawford Brown
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More quotes by Alton Brown

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I am firmly in the lard camp. It must be what we call leaf lard, which is a specific kind of lard that resides around certain internal organs in the pig.
Alton Brown
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Good service can save a bad meal, but there is no level of food that can save bad service.
Alton Brown
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Slicing a warm slab of bacon is a lot like giving a ferret a shave. No matter how careful you are, somebody's going to get hurt.
Alton Brown
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The kitchen's a laboratory, and everything that happens there has to do with science. It's biology, chemistry, physics. Yes, there's history. Yes, there's artistry. Yes, to all of that. But what happened there, what actually happens to the food is all science.
Alton Brown
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Cooking is an observation-based process that you can't do if you're so completely focused on a recipe.
Alton Brown
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Unless your kid is Pele Jr., they're not going to be able to feed themselves from soccer. If your kid knows how to play soccer, but not make dinner, you have done them a disservice.
Alton Brown
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Basting is evil. Basting does nothing for the meat. Why? Skin. Skin is designed to keep stuff out of the bird, so basting just lets heat out of the oven. That means the turkey will take longer to cook... so don't touch that door!
Alton Brown
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I found that if I offered to cook for a girl, my odds improved radically over simply asking a girl out. Through my efforts to attract the opposite sex, I found that not only did cooking work, but that it was actually fun.
Alton Brown
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Take ice. Ice is fascinating to me. Ice is the one thing in our world that went from an agricultural product to being manufactured.
Alton Brown
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The turkey - my number one thing that people don't get is take that sucker out of the refrigerator about three hours before you plan on cooking it.
Alton Brown
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Racism. It's ugly. Even in tubers.
Alton Brown
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There are no bad foods, only bad food habits.
Alton Brown
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I love poking fun at myself. I have a rather mean sense of humor.
Alton Brown
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A pie dough comes together exactly like a biscuit only there is very, very little liquid and no leavening involved. Other than that, the same rules apply. My best advice: handle the dough as little as possible.
Alton Brown
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That's the ultimate goal of most turkey recipes: to create a great skin and stuffing to hide the fact that turkey meat, in its cooked state, is dry and flavorless. Does it have to be that way? No. We just have to focus on what the turkey is and what the turkey needs.
Alton Brown
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I am publicly apolitical.
Alton Brown
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A balanced diet may be the best medicine. I was eating too much good eats. But people consider that part of your job, you know? Eat. And I do!
Alton Brown
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I only really fake it anymore with sommeliers who are being really snotty to me and I don't want to take their grief and so I try to do something to kind of throw them off or put them on the defensive, even if I don't know what I'm talking about
Alton Brown
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Remember, America: organization will set you free.
Alton Brown
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I became a cook so I could cook and tell stories in wacky ways.
Alton Brown