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Unless your kid is Pele Jr., they're not going to be able to feed themselves from soccer. If your kid knows how to play soccer, but not make dinner, you have done them a disservice.

Alton Brown

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Alton Brown
Age: 62
Born: 1962
Born: July 30
Actor
Author
Chef
Cinematographer
Musician
Television Personality
Voice Actor
Writer
LA
California
Alton Crawford Walter Brown
Alton Crawford Brown
Kids
Able
Play
Pele
Done
Disservice
Going
Feed
Make
Soccer
Dinner
Unless

More quotes by Alton Brown

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I never rated my cuddle factor, but I expect it's pretty low.
Alton Brown
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The only unitasker allowed in my kitchen is a fire extinguisher.
Alton Brown
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Take ice. Ice is fascinating to me. Ice is the one thing in our world that went from an agricultural product to being manufactured.
Alton Brown
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Your patience will be rewarded.
Alton Brown
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I'm grateful my teenaged daughter is healthy and well and for the work I do to make a living.
Alton Brown
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My advice: write down everything you eat. It's amazing what that self honesty can do for you. (Do you really want to have to confess that doughnut? I thought not.)
Alton Brown
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I say grace. I'm a big believer in grace. I happen to believe in a God that made all the food and so I'm pretty grateful for that and I thank him for that. But I'm also thankful for the people that put the food on the table.
Alton Brown
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So I quit my job and went to the New England Culinary Institute for the full two years and worked in the restaurant industry after that until finally I thought I had a grasp on what I needed to do what I do.
Alton Brown
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Well, you know, when you go into a restaurant, one of the scariest things is the wine list, so whenever I'm really feeling intimidated, I'll just pick a wine type, like a Chianti or Brunello or a Burgundy, and I'll pick a year that's missing and ask for that one.
Alton Brown
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The worst food you'll ever eat will probably be prepared by a 'cook' who calls himself a 'chef.' Mark my words.
Alton Brown
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If I took my turkey out of the refrigerator and, like, threw it in a dumpster or drug it down the street in New York for a while [it will make people sick].
Alton Brown
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I grill almost all of my fish with the skin on because that gives you real protection at least on one side. It's a nice barrier against super high heat which tends to make a lot of fish to turn really flaky. It's very easy to overcook fish on the grill. But I still brush it with oil before I start.
Alton Brown
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I played every bad guy in Shakespeare.
Alton Brown
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Cranberries contain a massive amount of natural pectins. They will gel all on their own, which is why you can basically make cranberry sauce out of filling.
Alton Brown
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I only really fake it anymore with sommeliers who are being really snotty to me and I don't want to take their grief and so I try to do something to kind of throw them off or put them on the defensive, even if I don't know what I'm talking about
Alton Brown
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The thing that helped me get into the film business was that I went to school in Athens, Georgia and managed to get on, um, working on music videos for a band called R.E.M. and that kind of opened up a lot of doors for me.
Alton Brown
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I hate using the word coagulant.
Alton Brown
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We are fat and sick and dying because we have handed a basic, fundamental and intimate function of life over to corporations. We choose to value our nourishment so little that we entrust it to strangers. This is insanity. Feed yourselves. Feed your loved ones. And for God's sake feed your children.
Alton Brown
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I do like artfully breaking rules.
Alton Brown
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The stubby French painter Toulouse-Lautrec supposedly invented chocolate mousse - I find that rather hard to believe, but there you have it.
Alton Brown