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Never trust a man who combs his hair straight from his left armpit.
Alice Roosevelt Longworth
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Alice Roosevelt Longworth
Age: 96 †
Born: 1884
Born: February 12
Died: 1980
Died: February 20
Autobiographer
Socialite
Writer
Manhattan borough
New York City
Alice Lee Roosevelt Longworth
Alice Lee Roosevelt
Baby Lee Roosevelt
Alice Roosevelt
Alice Roosevelt Longworth
Never
Armpit
Men
Armpits
Combs
Straight
Hair
Trust
Funny
Left
More quotes by Alice Roosevelt Longworth
I can be President of the United States, or I can control Alice. I cannot possibly do both.
Alice Roosevelt Longworth
My specialty is detached malevolence.
Alice Roosevelt Longworth
People in Washington seem as hypnotized by precedence as though they were hens with their beaks on a chalk line.
Alice Roosevelt Longworth
My father always wanted to be the corpse at every funeral, the bride at every wedding and the baby at every christening.
Alice Roosevelt Longworth
I valued my independence from an early age and was always something of a individualist … Well, a show-off anyway.
Alice Roosevelt Longworth
I live by three rules: I eat when I'm hungry, sleep when I'm tired and scratch when I itch.
Alice Roosevelt Longworth
He sprang from the grass roots of the country clubs of America.
Alice Roosevelt Longworth
[On Washington, D.C.:] a town of successful men and the women they married before they were successful.
Alice Roosevelt Longworth
I've always believed in the adage that the secret of eternal youth is arrested development.
Alice Roosevelt Longworth
He looks as though he's been weaned on a pickle.
Alice Roosevelt Longworth
I have a simple philosophy: Fill what's empty. Empty what's full. Scratch where it itches.
Alice Roosevelt Longworth
I'm the only topless octogenarian in Washington.
Alice Roosevelt Longworth
... [woman suffrage] has made little difference beyond doubling the number of voters. There is no woman's vote as such. They divide up just about as men do.
Alice Roosevelt Longworth
If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me.
Alice Roosevelt Longworth
If YOU DON'T HAVE ANYTHING NICE TO SAY ABOUT ANYONE..COME SIT BY ME.
Alice Roosevelt Longworth
If you can't say something nice about someone, come and sit right here next to me.
Alice Roosevelt Longworth
You can't make souffle rise twice.
Alice Roosevelt Longworth
If you can't think of anything nice to say, come sit here beside me.
Alice Roosevelt Longworth
If you can't say anything good about someone, sit right here by me.
Alice Roosevelt Longworth
[Remark about Calvin Coolidge she says was erroneously attributed to her:] I do wish he did not look as if he had been weaned on a pickle.
Alice Roosevelt Longworth
