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How we feel about our kids isn't as important as how they experience those feelings and how they regard the way we treat them.

Alfie Kohn

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Alfie Kohn
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: October 15
Author
Teacher
Writer
Miami Beach
Florida
Important
Treat
Way
Treats
Regard
Experience
Feelings
Kids
Feel
Feels

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If a child is off-task...mayb e the problem is not the child...maybe it's the task.
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When was the last time you spent the entire day with only 42 year olds?
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Most of us would protest that of course we love our children without any strings attached. But what counts is how things look from the perspective of the children
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The overwhelming number of teachers ...are unable to name or describe a theory of learning that underlies what they do.
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Children learn how to make good decisions by making decisions, not by following directions.
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Grades dilute the pleasure that a student experiences on successfully completing a task.
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Learning is something students do, NOT something done to students.
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Those who know they're valued irrespective of their accomplishments often end up accomplishing quite a lot. It's the experience of being accepted without conditions that helps people develop a healthy confidence in themselves, a belief that it's safe to take risks and try new things.
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Whoever said there's no such thing as a stupid question never looked carefully at a standardized test.
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Someone who thinks well of himself is said to have a healthy self-concept and is envied. Someone who thinks well of his country is called a patriot and is applauded. But someone who thinks well of his species is regarded as hopelessly naïve and is dismissed.
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People will typically be more enthusiastic where they feel a sense of belonging and see themselves as part of a community than they will in a workplace in which each person is left to his own devices
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Trying to be number one and trying to do a task well are two different things.
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Children, after all, are not just adults-in-the-making. They are people whose current needs and rights and experiences must be taken seriously.
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How can we do our best when we are spending our energies trying to make others lose - and fearing that they will make us lose?
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Educational success should be measured by how strong your desire is to keep learning.
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Punishment and reward proceed from basically the same psychological model, one that conceives of motivation as nothing more than the manipulation of behavior.
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A preoccupation with achievement is not only different from, but often detrimental to, a focus on learning. Thoughts and emotions while performing an action are more important in determining subsequent engagement than the actual outcome of that action.
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Trying to do well and trying to beat others are two different things. Excellence and victory are conceptually distinct . . . and are experienced differently.
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In a word, learning is decontextualized. We break ideas down into tiny pieces that bear no relation to the whole. We give students a brick of information, followed by another brick, followed by another brick, until they are graduated, at which point we assume they have a house. What they have is a pile of bricks, and they don't have it for long.
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Punishments and rewards are two sides of the same coin and that coin doesn't buy you much.
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