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There's a part of me that still hates everything, and my natural view default setting is still very cynical and dark

Alexei Sayle

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Alexei Sayle
Age: 72
Born: 1952
Born: August 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
City of Liverpool
Alexei David Sayle
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Setting
Everything
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Views
Dark
Natural
Default
Hate
Hates
Stills
Cynical
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More quotes by Alexei Sayle

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The optimum frequency with which comedians should do a series is every year. I do one every three years. My audience is literally dying off.
Alexei Sayle
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I suppose the common idea of me is that I'm going to be someone who's hyper and cracking jokes all the time, but people who meet me are soon disabused of that notion.
Alexei Sayle
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If I won the lottery I'd start a charity that helped little family hardware stores, cobblers and fruit shops open in city centres.
Alexei Sayle
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For me, the showbiz memoir is uninteresting - you want to tell people something they don't know about.
Alexei Sayle
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Dire Straits is a great band. Someone tells you they like Brothers in Arms and immediately you know they're a stupid annoying git.
Alexei Sayle
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Yuri Gagarin, the first man in space, may have had his charms, but he really couldn't be considered hip.
Alexei Sayle
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First off, I have to mention what is undoubtedly the greatest phenomenon of the modern era: All You Can Eat Buffets.
Alexei Sayle
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Americans have different ways of saying things. They say 'elevator', we say 'lift'... they say 'President', we say 'stupid psychopathic git.
Alexei Sayle
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People used to think I was just a shouty comic but I was doing stuff about Sartre.
Alexei Sayle
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I have a lot of nice Italian winter clothes that make me look like a sophisticated Lebanese professor, so my friend Robert and I go around pretending to be experts in Arabic politics. It doesn't work in the summer though. I don't have the right clothes.
Alexei Sayle
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Now, as a comic, if you're vaguely amusing you can go straight into TV, then you play the O2 and then everyone's sick of you.
Alexei Sayle
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If sitcoms were easy to write, there'd be a lot of good ones, and there aren't.
Alexei Sayle
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Even a blind dog can find a bone every so often.
Alexei Sayle
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I'm sure a psychologist would see something highly significant in how absent-minded I am. I mean I'd forget my head if it wasn't attached to my neck by muscles, ligaments and my esophagus.
Alexei Sayle
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Everyone I used to work with is still alive and can afford expensive lawyers.
Alexei Sayle
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Honestly, sometimes I get really fed up of my subconscious - it's like it's got a mind of its own.
Alexei Sayle
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I don't think I'd ever get thin, but I don't see why I should necessarily think that I couldn't You can't live your life for your routines.
Alexei Sayle
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People are more violently opposed to fur than leather because it's safer to harass rich women than motorcycle gangs.
Alexei Sayle
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I've been going to Granada for many years and 12 years ago bought a house a few miles outside the city.
Alexei Sayle
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I did six series for the BBC and that was enough. I've been writing for ten years, which is more challenging artistically.
Alexei Sayle