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A lot of those comics can't hold down relationships and they've got no other life apart from performing. They sleep in their Jags and a lot of them can't even talk. All they can do is tell gags.

Alexei Sayle

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Alexei Sayle
Age: 72
Born: 1952
Born: August 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
City of Liverpool
Alexei David Sayle
Talk
Tell
Gags
Even
Comics
Life
Performing
Apart
Relationships
Hold
Sleep

More quotes by Alexei Sayle

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Israel is the Jimmy Saville of nation states.
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There's a part of me that still hates everything, and my natural view default setting is still very cynical and dark
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I'm sure a psychologist would see something highly significant in how absent-minded I am. I mean I'd forget my head if it wasn't attached to my neck by muscles, ligaments and my esophagus.
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You can't do comedy with a beard.
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I feel sorry for many politicians we expect them to be completely consistent and moralised when we're not.
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Dire Straits is a great band. Someone tells you they like Brothers in Arms and immediately you know they're a stupid annoying git.
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However, my problems with my memory are further complicated by the fact that while I don't have any recollection of things I have actually done, I have very vivid recollections of loads of things that I haven't done.
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But as in all cults, what's central to the Communist Party is the belief system and the elimination of nuance. From there you're very slowly led down the road to fanaticism and mass murder.
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If someone starts agreeing with me, I don't like it. Out of pique, I become something else.
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I think that my ideas of the world are that it's random and cruel but kind of quite comical really, and therefore the humour, in a sense, springs from that.
Alexei Sayle
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People are more violently opposed to fur than leather because it's safer to harass rich women than motorcycle gangs.
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Everyone I used to work with is still alive and can afford expensive lawyers.
Alexei Sayle
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I wanted to write about how people's beliefs shift.
Alexei Sayle
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As a comic, you try something and if it works you go with it and grind it to death.
Alexei Sayle
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I have a lot of nice Italian winter clothes that make me look like a sophisticated Lebanese professor, so my friend Robert and I go around pretending to be experts in Arabic politics. It doesn't work in the summer though. I don't have the right clothes.
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First off, I have to mention what is undoubtedly the greatest phenomenon of the modern era: All You Can Eat Buffets.
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For me, the showbiz memoir is uninteresting - you want to tell people something they don't know about.
Alexei Sayle
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It always seemed to be a constant that my parents were political.
Alexei Sayle
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I liked 35 and in both my novels that is the age of the lead characters. I tried making them my age but they just seemed to keep moaning about stuff.
Alexei Sayle
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The optimum frequency with which comedians should do a series is every year. I do one every three years. My audience is literally dying off.
Alexei Sayle