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You can't do comedy with a beard.

Alexei Sayle

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Alexei Sayle
Age: 72
Born: 1952
Born: August 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
City of Liverpool
Alexei David Sayle
Beard
Comedy

More quotes by Alexei Sayle

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Dire Straits is a great band. Someone tells you they like Brothers in Arms and immediately you know they're a stupid annoying git.
Alexei Sayle
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Even a blind dog can find a bone every so often.
Alexei Sayle
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I always thought communism was crap, really.
Alexei Sayle
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The optimum frequency with which comedians should do a series is every year. I do one every three years. My audience is literally dying off.
Alexei Sayle
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I'm sure a psychologist would see something highly significant in how absent-minded I am. I mean I'd forget my head if it wasn't attached to my neck by muscles, ligaments and my esophagus.
Alexei Sayle
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A lot of those comics can't hold down relationships and they've got no other life apart from performing. They sleep in their Jags and a lot of them can't even talk. All they can do is tell gags.
Alexei Sayle
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Most of the Communists I knew were nice people.
Alexei Sayle
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I don't think I'd ever get thin, but I don't see why I should necessarily think that I couldn't You can't live your life for your routines.
Alexei Sayle
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For me, the showbiz memoir is uninteresting - you want to tell people something they don't know about.
Alexei Sayle
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I've been going to Granada for many years and 12 years ago bought a house a few miles outside the city.
Alexei Sayle
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Now, as a comic, if you're vaguely amusing you can go straight into TV, then you play the O2 and then everyone's sick of you.
Alexei Sayle
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I don't think people were that interested in what I was doing for the most of the 1990s.
Alexei Sayle
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If sitcoms were easy to write, there'd be a lot of good ones, and there aren't.
Alexei Sayle
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If someone starts agreeing with me, I don't like it. Out of pique, I become something else.
Alexei Sayle
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If you travel to the States... they have a lot of different words than like what we use. For instance: they say 'elevator', we say 'lift' they say 'drapes', we say 'curtains' they say 'president', we say 'seriously deranged git.'
Alexei Sayle
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Israel is the Jimmy Saville of nation states.
Alexei Sayle
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I exist as an annexe of the BBC. I'm down the road a bit from the main building, in a little hut.
Alexei Sayle
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I suppose the common idea of me is that I'm going to be someone who's hyper and cracking jokes all the time, but people who meet me are soon disabused of that notion.
Alexei Sayle
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It always seemed to be a constant that my parents were political.
Alexei Sayle
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People used to think I was just a shouty comic but I was doing stuff about Sartre.
Alexei Sayle