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You can't do comedy with a beard.

Alexei Sayle

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Alexei Sayle
Age: 72
Born: 1952
Born: August 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
City of Liverpool
Alexei David Sayle
Beard
Comedy

More quotes by Alexei Sayle

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Honestly, sometimes I get really fed up of my subconscious - it's like it's got a mind of its own.
Alexei Sayle
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My name is Alexei Yuri Gagarin Siege of Stalingrad Glorious Five Year Plan Sputnik Tractor Moscow Dynamo Back Four Balowski. Me Dad was a bit of a Communist, know what I mean?
Alexei Sayle
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But as in all cults, what's central to the Communist Party is the belief system and the elimination of nuance. From there you're very slowly led down the road to fanaticism and mass murder.
Alexei Sayle
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I think that my ideas of the world are that it's random and cruel but kind of quite comical really, and therefore the humour, in a sense, springs from that.
Alexei Sayle
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I have a lot of nice Italian winter clothes that make me look like a sophisticated Lebanese professor, so my friend Robert and I go around pretending to be experts in Arabic politics. It doesn't work in the summer though. I don't have the right clothes.
Alexei Sayle
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Dire Straits is a great band. Someone tells you they like Brothers in Arms and immediately you know they're a stupid annoying git.
Alexei Sayle
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Most of the Communists I knew were nice people.
Alexei Sayle
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People used to think I was just a shouty comic but I was doing stuff about Sartre.
Alexei Sayle
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If sitcoms were easy to write, there'd be a lot of good ones, and there aren't.
Alexei Sayle
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Even a blind dog can find a bone every so often.
Alexei Sayle
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For me, the showbiz memoir is uninteresting - you want to tell people something they don't know about.
Alexei Sayle
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I feel sorry for many politicians we expect them to be completely consistent and moralised when we're not.
Alexei Sayle
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If I won the lottery I'd start a charity that helped little family hardware stores, cobblers and fruit shops open in city centres.
Alexei Sayle
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People are more violently opposed to fur than leather because it's safer to harass rich women than motorcycle gangs.
Alexei Sayle
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If you travel to the States... they have a lot of different words than like what we use. For instance: they say 'elevator', we say 'lift' they say 'drapes', we say 'curtains' they say 'president', we say 'seriously deranged git.'
Alexei Sayle
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If someone starts agreeing with me, I don't like it. Out of pique, I become something else.
Alexei Sayle
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I don't think I'd ever get thin, but I don't see why I should necessarily think that I couldn't You can't live your life for your routines.
Alexei Sayle
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Everyone I used to work with is still alive and can afford expensive lawyers.
Alexei Sayle
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I don't think people were that interested in what I was doing for the most of the 1990s.
Alexei Sayle
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It always seemed to be a constant that my parents were political.
Alexei Sayle