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All the things I really like to do are either immoral, illegal or fattening.
Alexander Woollcott
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Alexander Woollcott
Age: 56 †
Born: 1887
Born: January 19
Died: 1943
Died: January 23
Actor
Critic
Journalist
Literary Critic
Radio Personality
Writer
Phalanx
New Jersey
Alexander Humphreys Woollcott
Really
Things
Fattening
Like
Immoral
Fats
Illegal
Food
Either
Funny
More quotes by Alexander Woollcott
I count it a high honor to belong to a profession in which the good men write every paragraph, every sentence, every line, as lovingly as any Addison or Steele, and do so in full regard that by tomorrow it will have been burned, or used, if at all, to line a shelf.
Alexander Woollcott
To all things clergic I am allergic.
Alexander Woollcott
A hick town is one where there is no place to go where you shouldn't go.
Alexander Woollcott
Once in pre-war days, when curiously-bonneted women drivers were familiar sights at the taxi-wheels, I cried out to one in my dismay: Is there no speed limit in this mad city? Oh, yes, monsieur, she answered sweetly over her shoulder, but no one has ever succeeded in reaching it.
Alexander Woollcott
A broker is a man who runs your fortune into a shoestring.
Alexander Woollcott
His huff arrived and he departed in it.
Alexander Woollcott
One listens to one's lawyer prattle on as long as one can stand it and then signs where indicated.
Alexander Woollcott
Nothing risque, nothing gained.
Alexander Woollcott
The two oldest professions in the world — ruined by amateurs.
Alexander Woollcott
Los Angeles is seven suburbs in search of a city.
Alexander Woollcott
I'm tired of hearing it said that democracy doesn't work. Of course it doesn't work. We are supposed to work it.
Alexander Woollcott
She was like a sinking ship firing on the rescuers.
Alexander Woollcott
All the things I really like to do are either illegal, immoral, or fattening.
Alexander Woollcott
There's nothing wrong with Oscar Levant - nothing a miracle won't cure.
Alexander Woollcott
There's absolutely nothing wrong with Oscar Levant that a miracle can't fix.
Alexander Woollcott
Today just might be the best day to start seriously thinking about quitting smoking.
Alexander Woollcott
Babies in silk hats playing with dynamite.
Alexander Woollcott
At 83, George Bernard Shaw's mind was perhaps not quite as good as it used to be, but it was still better than anyone else's.
Alexander Woollcott
Mrs. Patrick Cambell is an aged British battleship sinking rapidly and firing every available gun on her rescuers.
Alexander Woollcott
You haven't lived until you died in New York.
Alexander Woollcott