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I don't recommend that people speak their minds to their bosses or to somebody who's directly over them. You need to know when to speak your mind and what the penalty will be for doing so. Sometimes it's worth it, and often it's not!

Albert Ellis

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Albert Ellis
Age: 93 †
Born: 1913
Born: September 27
Died: 2007
Died: July 24
Behaviour Therapist
Cognitive Scientist
Non-Fiction Writer
Psychologist
Sex Educator
Pittsburg
Pennsylvania
People
Worth
Somebody
Bosses
Often
Recommend
Speak
Penalty
Need
Penalties
Sometimes
Boss
Needs
Directly
Mind
Minds

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Is self-esteem a sickness? That's according to the way you define it. In the usual way it is defined by people and by psychologists, I'd say that it is probably the greatest emotional disturbance known to man and woman.
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Whining about your own, others', or the world's failings is a main element in what we usually call neurosis.
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The goal of all life is to have a ball.
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Rational beliefs bring us closer to getting good results in the real world.
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By honestly acknowledging your past errors, but never damning yourself for them, you can learn to use your past for your own future benefit.
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If the Martians ever find out how human beings think, they'll kill themselves laughing.
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For that again, is what all manner of religion essentially is: childish dependency.
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You have only to exist as you do and to live your life as best you can.
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I would like to be remembered as one of the individuals who founded, ideologically and practically, cognitive behavior therapy and who pioneered multimodal or integrated therapy.
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If you would stop, really stop, damning yourself, others, and unkind conditions, you would find it almost impossible to upset yourself emotionally - about anything. Yes, anything.
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If I had been a member of the academic establishment, I could have done other experiments.
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I regret that I've been so busy with clinical work that I haven't been able to spend much time on experiments and outcome studies.
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I'm very happy. I like my work and I like the various aspects of it - going around the world, teaching the gospel according to St. Albert - I like that. And seeing clients, doing group therapy, writing books.
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This, perhaps, goes to show that conditional self-esteem, as I have said for many years, is an insidious, real sickness, so much so that even Buddhists carelessly sneak it in and sometimes encourage their clients to achieve it.
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The goal...is not to change your desires and wishes but to persuade you to stop demanding that you absolutely must have what you wish-from yourself, from others, and from the world. You can by all means keep your wishes, preferences, and desires, but unless you prefer to remain needlessly anxious, not your grandiose demands.
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The trouble with most therapy is that it helps you feel better. But you don't get better. You have to back it up with action, action, action.
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The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own.
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People don't just get upset. They contribute to their upsetness.
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If human emotions largely result from thinking, then one may appreciably control one's feelings by controlling one's thoughts - or by changing the internalized sentences, or self-talk, with which one largely created the feeling in the first place.
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People could rationally decide that prolonged relationships take up too much time and effort and that they'd much rather do other kinds of things. But most people are afraid of rejection.
Albert Ellis