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Whatever may be, I am still largely the creator and ruler of my emotional destiny.

Albert Ellis

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Albert Ellis
Age: 93 †
Born: 1913
Born: September 27
Died: 2007
Died: July 24
Behaviour Therapist
Cognitive Scientist
Non-Fiction Writer
Psychologist
Sex Educator
Pittsburg
Pennsylvania
May
Largely
Creator
Destiny
Emotional
Responsibility
Whatever
Stills
Ruler
Still
Rulers

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I would have liked having children to some degree, but frankly I haven't got the time to take the kids to the goddamn ballgame. So it would have had more disadvantages than advantages for them.
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Worry itself is one of the most painful conditions.
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You largely constructed your depression. It wasn't given to you. Therefore, you can deconstruct it.
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Most things worth having require some sacrifice, usually more than you expect.
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There are three musts that hold us back: I must do well. You must treat me well. And the world must be easy.
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Convince yourself that worrying about many situations will make them worse rather than improve them.
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People could rationally decide that prolonged relationships take up too much time and effort and that they'd much rather do other kinds of things. But most people are afraid of rejection.
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Failure doesn't have anything to do with your intrinsic value as a person.
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Worrying about dying will hardly help you live.
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Eating is always a decision, nobody forces your hand to pick up food and put it into your mouth.
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The trouble with most therapy is that it helps you feel better. But you don't get better. You have to back it up with action, action, action.
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Religious creeds encourage some of the craziest kinds of thoughts, emotions, and behaviors and favor severe manifestations of neurosis, borderline personality states, and sometimes even psychosis.
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When I started to get disillusioned with psychoanalysis I reread philosophy and was reminded of the constructivist notion that Epictetus had proposed 2,000 years ago: People are disturbed not by events that happen to them, but by their view of them. I could see how that applied to many of my clients.
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People and things do not upset us. Rather, we upset ourselves by believing that they can upset us.
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The individual is taught that there is nothing that he as a total person is to feel ashamed of or self-hating for.
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I get people to truly accept themselves unconditionally, whether or not their therapist or anyone loves them.
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Spirit and soul is horseshit of the worst sort. Obviously there are no fairies, no Santa Clauses, no spirits. What there is, is human goals and purposes as noted by sane existentialists. But a lot of transcendentalists are utter screwballs.
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Attempts to help humans eliminate all self-ratings and views self-esteem as a self-defeating concept that encourages them to make conditional evaluations of self. Instead, it teaches people unconditional self-acceptance.
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Whining about your own, others', or the world's failings is a main element in what we usually call neurosis.
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As a result of my philosophy, I wasn't even upset about Hitler. I was willing to go to war to knock him off, but I didn't hate him. I hated what he was doing.
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