Quote

Happiness is experienced largely in striving towards a goal, not in having attained things, because our nature is always to want to go on to the next endeavor.

Albert Ellis

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Albert Ellis
Age: 93 †
Born: 1913
Born: September 27
Died: 2007
Died: July 24
Behaviour Therapist
Cognitive Scientist
Non-Fiction Writer
Psychologist
Sex Educator
Pittsburg
Pennsylvania
Strive
Towards
Goal
Happiness
Attained
Next
Striving
Nature
Largely
Always
Endeavor
Things
Experienced

More quotes by Albert Ellis

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Whining about your own, others', or the world's failings is a main element in what we usually call neurosis.
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If human emotions largely result from thinking, then one may appreciably control one's feelings by controlling one's thoughts - or by changing the internalized sentences, or self-talk, with which one largely created the feeling in the first place.
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Eating is always a decision, nobody forces your hand to pick up food and put it into your mouth.
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Most things worth having require some sacrifice, usually more than you expect.
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By honestly acknowledging your past errors, but never damning yourself for them, you can learn to use your past for your own future benefit.
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People don't just get upset. They contribute to their upsetness.
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Neurosis is just a high-class word for whining.
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Failure doesn't have anything to do with your intrinsic value as a person.
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I get people to truly accept themselves unconditionally, whether or not their therapist or anyone loves them.
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Worry itself is one of the most painful conditions.
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I regret that I've been so busy with clinical work that I haven't been able to spend much time on experiments and outcome studies.
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And just as two wrongs don't make a right, rage against offenders is probably the worst way to try to correct them.
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I had a great many sex and love cases where people were absolutely devastated when somebody with whom they were compulsively in love didn't love them back. They were killing themselves with anxiety and depression.
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When people change their irrational beliefs to undogmatic flexible preferences, they become less disturbed.
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Many psychoanalysts refused to let me speak at their meetings. They were exceptionally vigorous because I had previously been an analyst and they were very angry at my flying the coop.
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The attitude of unconditional self-acceptance is probably the most important variable in their long-term recovery.
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The goal...is not to change your desires and wishes but to persuade you to stop demanding that you absolutely must have what you wish-from yourself, from others, and from the world. You can by all means keep your wishes, preferences, and desires, but unless you prefer to remain needlessly anxious, not your grandiose demands.
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You have only to exist as you do and to live your life as best you can.
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I think the future of psychotherapy and psychology is in the school system. We need to teach every child how to rarely seriously disturb himself or herself and how to overcome disturbance when it occurs.
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People are terrified of other people or difficult projects because they tell themselves that they could fail or be rejected. Failure can lead to sorrow, regret, frustration and annoyance-all healthy feelings without which people couldn't exist.
Albert Ellis