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Unless, of course, you insist on identifying yourself with the people and things you love and thereby seriously disturb yourself.

Albert Ellis

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Albert Ellis
Age: 93 †
Born: 1913
Born: September 27
Died: 2007
Died: July 24
Behaviour Therapist
Cognitive Scientist
Non-Fiction Writer
Psychologist
Sex Educator
Pittsburg
Pennsylvania
Course
Detachment
Things
Identifying
Love
Thereby
People
Insist
Attachment
Seriously
Unless
Courses
Disturb

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The easy way out is often just that-the 'easy' way out of the most rewarding lifestyle.
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There's no evidence whatsoever that men are more rational than women or that men are more willing to surrender their irrational beliefs. Both sexes seem to be equally irrational.
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Most things worth having require some sacrifice, usually more than you expect.
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You have only to exist as you do and to live your life as best you can.
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The trouble with most therapy is that it helps you feel better. But you don't get better. You have to back it up with action, action, action.
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Most people would have given up when faced with all the criticism I've received over the years.
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The attitude of unconditional self-acceptance is probably the most important variable in their long-term recovery.
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Even injustice has it's good points. It gives me the challenge of being as happy as I can in an unfair world.
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There's no evidence whatsoever that men are more rational than women. Both sexes seem to be equally irrational.
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Eating is always a decision, nobody forces your hand to pick up food and put it into your mouth.
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I think the future of psychotherapy and psychology is in the school system. We need to teach every child how to rarely seriously disturb himself or herself and how to overcome disturbance when it occurs. In that sense, psychotherapy belongs in the schools.
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Needing leads to bleeding - to almost all inevitable suffering.
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If people stopped looking on their emotions as ethereal, almost inhuman processes, and realistically viewed them as being largely composed of perceptions, thoughts, evaluations, and internalized sentences, they would find it quite possible to work calmly and concertedly at changing them.
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Rational beliefs bring us closer to getting good results in the real world.
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The goal...is not to change your desires and wishes but to persuade you to stop demanding that you absolutely must have what you wish-from yourself, from others, and from the world. You can by all means keep your wishes, preferences, and desires, but unless you prefer to remain needlessly anxious, not your grandiose demands.
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To err is human to forgive people and yourself for poor behavior is to be sensible and realistic.
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If the Martians ever find out how human beings think, they'll kill themselves laughing.
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Being assertive does not mean attacking or ignoring others feelings. It means that you are willing to hold up for yourself fairly-without attacking others.
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When I started to get disillusioned with psychoanalysis I reread philosophy and was reminded of the constructivist notion that Epictetus had proposed 2,000 years ago: People are disturbed not by events that happen to them, but by their view of them. I could see how that applied to many of my clients.
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Whenever you avoid alarming situations, you almost always increase your anxiety about them.
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