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Convince yourself that worrying about many situations will make them worse rather than improve them.

Albert Ellis

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Albert Ellis
Age: 93 †
Born: 1913
Born: September 27
Died: 2007
Died: July 24
Behaviour Therapist
Cognitive Scientist
Non-Fiction Writer
Psychologist
Sex Educator
Pittsburg
Pennsylvania
Rather
Worrying
Many
Situations
Make
Convince
Improve
Anxiety
Worse
Worry
Situation

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People have motives and thoughts of which they are unaware.
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The emotionally mature individual should completely accept the fact that we live in a world of probability and chance, where there are not, nor probably ever will be, any absolute certainties, and should realize that it is not at all horrible, indeed—such a probabilistic, uncertain world.
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Attempts to help humans eliminate all self-ratings and views self-esteem as a self-defeating concept that encourages them to make conditional evaluations of self. Instead, it teaches people unconditional self-acceptance.
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Strong feelings are fine it's the overreactions that mess us up.
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By honestly acknowledging your past errors, but never damning yourself for them, you can learn to use your past for your own future benefit.
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You largely constructed your depression. It wasn't given to you. Therefore, you can deconstruct it.
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You mainly feel the way you think.
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The attitude of unconditional self-acceptance is probably the most important variable in their long-term recovery.
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People could rationally decide that prolonged relationships take up too much time and effort and that they'd much rather do other kinds of things. But most people are afraid of rejection.
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By not caring too much about what people think, I'm able to think for myself and propagate ideas which are very often unpopular. And I succeed.
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The goal...is not to change your desires and wishes but to persuade you to stop demanding that you absolutely must have what you wish-from yourself, from others, and from the world. You can by all means keep your wishes, preferences, and desires, but unless you prefer to remain needlessly anxious, not your grandiose demands.
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Whining about your own, others', or the world's failings is a main element in what we usually call neurosis.
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People and things do not upset us. Rather, we upset ourselves by believing that they can upset us.
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To err is human to forgive people and yourself for poor behavior is to be sensible and realistic.
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People are terrified of other people or difficult projects because they tell themselves that they could fail or be rejected. Failure can lead to sorrow, regret, frustration and annoyance-all healthy feelings without which people couldn't exist.
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When people change their irrational beliefs to undogmatic flexible preferences, they become less disturbed.
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Even injustice has it's good points. It gives me the challenge of being as happy as I can in an unfair world.
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So I'd better stop my whining and help myself cope better with even the worst Adversities.
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I think the future of psychotherapy and psychology is in the school system. We need to teach every child how to rarely seriously disturb himself or herself and how to overcome disturbance when it occurs. In that sense, psychotherapy belongs in the schools.
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I'm one of the best-loved psychologists in the United States, but I'm also probably the most hated one.
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