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In fact most of what we call anxiety is overconcern about what someone thinks of you.

Albert Ellis

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Albert Ellis
Age: 93 †
Born: 1913
Born: September 27
Died: 2007
Died: July 24
Behaviour Therapist
Cognitive Scientist
Non-Fiction Writer
Psychologist
Sex Educator
Pittsburg
Pennsylvania
Facts
Someone
Thinking
Anxiety
Thinks
Worry
Call
Fact

More quotes by Albert Ellis

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People and things do not upset us. Rather, we upset ourselves by believing that they can upset us.
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The more sinful and guilty a person tends to feel, the less chance there is that he will be a happy, healthy, or law-abiding citizen. He will become a compulsive wrong-doer.
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Convince yourself that worrying about many situations will make them worse rather than improve them.
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People got insights into what was bothering them, but they hardly did a damn thing to change.
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The emotionally mature individual should completely accept the fact that we live in a world of probability and chance, where there are not, nor probably ever will be, any absolute certainties, and should realize that it is not at all horrible, indeed—such a probabilistic, uncertain world.
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The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own.
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Lack of forgiveness of others breeds lack of self-forgiveness.
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By not caring too much about what people think, I'm able to think for myself and propagate ideas which are very often unpopular. And I succeed.
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We teach people that they upset themselves. We can't change the past, so we change how people are thinking, feeling and behaving today.
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Being assertive does not mean attacking or ignoring others feelings. It means that you are willing to hold up for yourself fairly-without attacking others.
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The goal...is not to change your desires and wishes but to persuade you to stop demanding that you absolutely must have what you wish-from yourself, from others, and from the world. You can by all means keep your wishes, preferences, and desires, but unless you prefer to remain needlessly anxious, not your grandiose demands.
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Most people would have given up when faced with all the criticism I've received over the years.
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I think it's unfair, but they have the right as fallible, screwed-up humans to be unfair that's the human condition.
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Neurosis is just a high-class word for whining.
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By honestly acknowledging your past errors, but never damning yourself for them, you can learn to use your past for your own future benefit.
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This, perhaps, goes to show that conditional self-esteem, as I have said for many years, is an insidious, real sickness, so much so that even Buddhists carelessly sneak it in and sometimes encourage their clients to achieve it.
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I had a great many sex and love cases where people were absolutely devastated when somebody with whom they were compulsively in love didn't love them back. They were killing themselves with anxiety and depression.
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Freud had a gene for inefficiency, and I think I have a gene for efficiency.
Albert Ellis
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Worry itself is one of the most painful conditions.
Albert Ellis
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I would have liked having children to some degree, but frankly I haven't got the time to take the kids to the goddamn ballgame.
Albert Ellis