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Needing leads to bleeding - to almost all inevitable suffering.

Albert Ellis

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Albert Ellis
Age: 93 †
Born: 1913
Born: September 27
Died: 2007
Died: July 24
Behaviour Therapist
Cognitive Scientist
Non-Fiction Writer
Psychologist
Sex Educator
Pittsburg
Pennsylvania
Almost
Suffering
Needing
Bleeding
Inevitable
Leads
Acceptance

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Stop shoulding on yourself
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Thinking rationally is often different from positive thinking, in that it is a realistic assessment of the situation, with a view towards rectifying the problem if possible.
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Self-esteem is the greatest sickness known to man or woman because it's conditional.
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The attitude of unconditional self-acceptance is probably the most important variable in their long-term recovery.
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When people change their irrational beliefs to undogmatic flexible preferences, they become less disturbed.
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Many psychoanalysts refused to let me speak at their meetings. They were exceptionally vigorous because I had previously been an analyst and they were very angry at my flying the coop.
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Most things worth having require some sacrifice, usually more than you expect.
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Convince yourself that worrying about many situations will make them worse rather than improve them.
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By honestly acknowledging your past errors, but never damning yourself for them, you can learn to use your past for your own future benefit.
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I get people to truly accept themselves unconditionally, whether or not their therapist or anyone loves them.
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The art of love is largely the art of persistence.
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Religious fanaticism has clearly produced, and in all probability will continue to produce, enormous amounts of bickering, fighting, violence, bloodshed, homicide, feuds, wars, and genocide.
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For that again, is what all manner of religion essentially is: childish dependency.
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I had used eclectic therapy and behavior therapy on myself at the age of 19 to get over my fear of public speaking and of approaching young women in public.
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You never truly need what you want. That is the main and thoroughgoing key to serenity.
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Let's suppose somebody abused you sexually. You still had a choice, though not a good one, about what to tell yourself about the abuse.
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People got insights into what was bothering them, but they hardly did a damn thing to change.
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When I started to get disillusioned with psychoanalysis I reread philosophy and was reminded of the constructivist notion that Epictetus had proposed 2,000 years ago: People are disturbed not by events that happen to them, but by their view of them. I could see how that applied to many of my clients.
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I teach people to be flexible, scientific and logical in their thinking and therefore to be less prone to brainwashing by the therapist.
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Whenever you avoid alarming situations, you almost always increase your anxiety about them.
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