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By honestly acknowledging your past errors, but never damning yourself for them, you can learn to use your past for your own future benefit.

Albert Ellis

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Albert Ellis
Age: 93 †
Born: 1913
Born: September 27
Died: 2007
Died: July 24
Behaviour Therapist
Cognitive Scientist
Non-Fiction Writer
Psychologist
Sex Educator
Pittsburg
Pennsylvania
Never
Errors
Honestly
Benefits
Failure
Future
Learn
Damning
Use
Acknowledging
Past
Benefit

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I started to call myself a rational therapist in 1955 later I used the term rational emotive. Now I call myself a rational emotive behavior therapist.
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Whining about your own, others', or the world's failings is a main element in what we usually call neurosis.
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When people change their irrational beliefs to undogmatic flexible preferences, they become less disturbed.
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Whatever may be, I am still largely the creator and ruler of my emotional destiny.
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The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You do not blame them on your mother, the ecology, or the president. You realize that you control your own destiny.
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The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own.
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Beginning in the 1960s, many studies showed that people who hold what we call irrational beliefs are significantly more disturbed than when they don't hold them, and the more strongly they hold them, the more disturbed they tend to be.
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When I started to get disillusioned with psychoanalysis I reread philosophy and was reminded of the constructivist notion that Epictetus had proposed 2,000 years ago: People are disturbed not by events that happen to them, but by their view of them. I could see how that applied to many of my clients.
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Reality is not so much what happens to us rather, it is how we think about those events that create the reality we experience. In a very real sense, this means that we each create the reality in which we live.
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Self-esteem is the greatest sickness known to man or woman because it's conditional.
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Rational beliefs bring us closer to getting good results in the real world.
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Is self-esteem a sickness? That's according to the way you define it. In the usual way it is defined by people and by psychologists, I'd say that it is probably the greatest emotional disturbance known to man and woman.
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People don't just get upset. They contribute to their upsetness.
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Freud had a gene for inefficiency, and I think I have a gene for efficiency.
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If human emotions largely result from thinking, then one may appreciably control one's feelings by controlling one's thoughts - or by changing the internalized sentences, or self-talk, with which one largely created the feeling in the first place.
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Happiness is experienced largely in striving towards a goal, not in having attained things, because our nature is always to want to go on to the next endeavor.
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We can't change the past, so we change how people are thinking, feeling and behaving today.
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Stop shoulding on yourself
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People are terrified of other people or difficult projects because they tell themselves that they could fail or be rejected. Failure can lead to sorrow, regret, frustration and annoyance-all healthy feelings without which people couldn't exist.
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Worry itself is one of the most painful conditions.
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