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You mainly feel the way you think.

Albert Ellis

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Albert Ellis
Age: 93 †
Born: 1913
Born: September 27
Died: 2007
Died: July 24
Behaviour Therapist
Cognitive Scientist
Non-Fiction Writer
Psychologist
Sex Educator
Pittsburg
Pennsylvania
Mainly
Feel
Feels
Way
Think
Thinking

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I had used eclectic therapy and behavior therapy on myself at the age of 19 to get over my fear of public speaking and of approaching young women in public.
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Most things worth having require some sacrifice, usually more than you expect.
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There are three musts that hold us back: I must do well. You must treat me well. And the world must be easy.
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Religious creeds encourage some of the craziest kinds of thoughts, emotions, and behaviors and favor severe manifestations of neurosis, borderline personality states, and sometimes even psychosis.
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If something is irrational, that means it won't work. It's usually unrealistic.
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You have only to exist as you do and to live your life as best you can.
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Freud had a gene for inefficiency, and I think I have a gene for efficiency.
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People could rationally decide that prolonged relationships take up too much time and effort and that they'd much rather do other kinds of things. But most people are afraid of rejection.
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The art of love is largely the art of persistence.
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In the old days we used to get more referrals, because people had insurance that paid for therapy. Now they belong to HMOs, and we can only be affiliated with a few HMOs.
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Religious fanaticism has clearly produced, and in all probability will continue to produce, enormous amounts of bickering, fighting, violence, bloodshed, homicide, feuds, wars, and genocide.
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Rational beliefs bring us closer to getting good results in the real world.
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Many psychoanalysts refused to let me speak at their meetings. They were exceptionally vigorous because I had previously been an analyst and they were very angry at my flying the coop.
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People don't just get upset. They contribute to their upsetness.
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Whenever you avoid alarming situations, you almost always increase your anxiety about them.
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I had a great many sex and love cases where people were absolutely devastated when somebody with whom they were compulsively in love didn't love them back. They were killing themselves with anxiety and depression.
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Humans can always accept themselves unconditionally.
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For that again, is what all manner of religion essentially is: childish dependency.
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People have motives and thoughts of which they are unaware.
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I wrote several articles criticizing psychoanalysis, but the analysts weren't listening to my objections. So I finally quit after practicing it for six years.
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