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If anything happens to me, tell every woman I've ever gone with I was talking about her at the end. That way, they'll have to reevaluate me.

Albert Brooks

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Albert Brooks
Age: 77
Born: 1947
Born: July 22
Actor
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Beverly Hills
California
Albert Lawrence Brooks
Albert Lawrence Einstein
A. Brooks
Way
Talking
Woman
Tell
Happens
Ends
Anything
Ever
Reevaluate
Every
Gone

More quotes by Albert Brooks

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I've never been disappointed, because I've never given somebody I liked that much power.
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If you're going to act and do this for a living, you want to play something that the audience didn't expect.
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What naturally stops you making the film is there is no more money in the budget. That's really what it is. If you had an unlimited budget, if you were a billionaire and you financed your own movies, then you can either date, because you can sit in an editing room for six years, like Howard Hughes, and never finish anything.
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Art and resistance are great together. That's what art's made for. Look at Vincent van Gogh: He didn't cut off his ear because he was selling well.
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Excited about Black Friday. Also excited about Jew Tuesday.
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You can equate acting to a tennis game: When you're playing one of the best, you get better.
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It's interesting when you're part of a group - the Jews, to be exact - that the world has had such problems with.
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Movies are an expensive business.
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I've always been the king of silence. I've always been a minimalist comedian. I've taken my influence from Jack Benny, who was the king of that I've always done 'less is more.'
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There's always the standard six people you can hire that have played all these villains in Hollywood. Instinctively, when they come on screen, you know what's going to happen. You don't know the story, but you know what they do.
Albert Brooks
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Film is the cheapest part of the movie making process. The expense is the 100-man crew and the financing and everything.
Albert Brooks
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I just like making people laugh, and buried in that I like to bring up topics and start discussions.
Albert Brooks
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If we had 3 million exhibitionists and only one voyeur, nobody could make any money.
Albert Brooks
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I've done performances in movies that I was immensely proud of and the movies didn't take off like a rocket at Cape Canaveral, it didn't take off.
Albert Brooks
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I think anger and laughter are very close to each other, when you think about it.
Albert Brooks
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Relaxation is the absence of worry.
Albert Brooks
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For the most part, improvising while cameras are rolling is very difficult. 99% of people you should never ask to do that, because they're under pressure, the clock is running, 80 people are staring at you...it's always unnatural.
Albert Brooks
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I don't think the goal is, 'How big a star did you ever become?' I think the goal is, 'Were you able to express yourself?'
Albert Brooks
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'Drive' came to me because the casting director knew my manager and called and said, 'You've always talked to me about Albert wanting to play the heavy. I think he should read this.' My ears just perked up.
Albert Brooks
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In the beginning of any career, in every job, people are always forcing you to the middle.
Albert Brooks