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If you keep yourself alive and current, funny is funny.

Alan King

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Alan King
Age: 76 †
Born: 1927
Born: December 26
Died: 2004
Died: May 9
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Stage Actor
Writer
Brooklyn
New York
Funny
Keep
Current
Currents
Alive

More quotes by Alan King

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When I read Dickens for the first time, I thought he was Jewish, because he wrote about oppression and bigotry, all the things that my father talked about.
Alan King
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I don't mind being 65, but nobody is gonna tell me to come in at 5:30 to have the early bird special.
Alan King
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Banks have a new image. Now you have 'a friend,' your friendly banker. If the banks are so friendly, how come they chain down the pens?
Alan King
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I was a high school throw-out.
Alan King
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Comedy is a reflection. We create nothing. We set no styles, no standards. We're reflections. It's a distorted mirror in the fun house. We watch society. As society behaves, then we have the ability to make fun of it.
Alan King
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A summary of every Jewish holiday: They tried to kill us, we won, let's eat!
Alan King
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Marriage is nature's way of keeping us from fighting with strangers.
Alan King
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You do live longer with bran, but you spend the last fifteen years on the toilet.
Alan King
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My father was a dreamer - my hero. He was a smart, tough guy from Poland, a cutter of lady's handbags, an old socialist-unionist who always considered himself a failure. His big line was: 'Don't end up like me.'
Alan King
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My father helped me leave. He said, 'It's all out there, it's not here.'
Alan King
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I think one of the big things about comedy is the ability for the audience to identify.
Alan King
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My son says I never tell stories about anyone who's living.
Alan King
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The other day my house caught fire. My lawyer said, Shouldn't be a problem. What kind of coverage do you have? I said, Fire and theft. The lawyer frowned. Uh oh. Wrong kind. Should be fire OR theft.
Alan King
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Let's face it: It's difficult enough to be funny without worrying about what is going to offend whom.
Alan King
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And humor has always been a weapon. You want to get even on somebody? You want to attack somebody? Make fun of them.
Alan King
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I made it, Ma - Carnegie Hall. And I didn't have to practice.
Alan King
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You know you are getting old when people tell you how good you look.
Alan King
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My brother is the youngest member of the College of Physicians and Surgeons. And I wouldn't let him cut my nails.
Alan King
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Larry David finds a way to make jokes about the Holocaust. It would never have occurred to me. And it was funny.
Alan King
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The world is full of little dictators trying to run your life.
Alan King