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Let's face it: It's difficult enough to be funny without worrying about what is going to offend whom.

Alan King

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Alan King
Age: 76 †
Born: 1927
Born: December 26
Died: 2004
Died: May 9
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Stage Actor
Writer
Brooklyn
New York
Going
Worrying
Worry
Face
Faces
Funny
Difficult
Without
Enough
Offend

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My father helped me leave. He said, 'It's all out there, it's not here.'
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The ability to absorb a book and make someone else's words and story your own was exactly was I was doing on stage.
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My favorite way to spend Saturday is in and out of bed, watching sports on TV and eating.
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We get the worrywart, the hypochondriac, the money-grubbing miser, the intractable negotiator... Some would say certain of these refer to the stereotypical, or 'stage' Jew. But objectively speaking, the only crime in humor is an unfunny joke.
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As a parent, I'd - I'd be a better father.
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A summary of every Jewish holiday: They tried to kill us, we won, let's eat!
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I was a high school throw-out.
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Eating takes a special talent. Some people are much better at it than others. In that way, it is like sex, and as with sex, it's more fun with someone who really likes it. I can't imagine having a lasting friendship with anyone who is not interested in food.
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If you stop and think about it, nearly all great humor is at the expense of someone or something.
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My father was a dreamer - my hero. He was a smart, tough guy from Poland, a cutter of lady's handbags, an old socialist-unionist who always considered himself a failure. His big line was: 'Don't end up like me.'
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There's nobody to believe in anymore, nobody to trust.
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When I get up in the morning, I have to decide what I'm going to have for dinner or I can't get through the day.
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Comedy is a reflection. We create nothing. We set no styles, no standards. We're reflections. It's a distorted mirror in the fun house. We watch society. As society behaves, then we have the ability to make fun of it.
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I think one of the big things about comedy is the ability for the audience to identify.
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That's the great thing about New Year's, you get to be a year older. For me, that wasn't such a joke, because my birthday was always around this time. When I was a kid, my father used to tell me that everybody was celebrating my birthday. That's what the trees are all about.
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Banks have a new image. Now you have 'a friend,' your friendly banker. If the banks are so friendly, how come they chain down the pens?
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Larry David finds a way to make jokes about the Holocaust. It would never have occurred to me. And it was funny.
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My son says I never tell stories about anyone who's living.
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It's not easy being a father, but I've been allowed a comeback.
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I'm only... I'm only unhappy when the reviews are bad, but give me a good review and I'm a... I'm just screaming all over the place with joy.
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